Again
by silver drip
Summary: When Loki invaded Midgard he did not expect to meet another god. Eventually Loki/Tony Stark
1. Frozen

**Chapter One: Frozen **

The clinking of ice cubes being angrily tossed into a glass unnerved Loki more than he was willing to admit. It was the only sound that penetrated the room other than his frantic heartbeat. He was frozen in place by a spell he did not recognize.

Loki tried turning his head to look out the window, to look at the battle, but his body would not comply. The only glimpse he caught was from his peripheral. Outside everything was motionless, no that's not right. If he looked hard enough Loki could see the gliding Chitauri moving in slow motion. It was another spell that he didn't recognize.

"You come to _my_ realm," Loki's attention snapped back to the mortal, no to the god in front of him, "you come to _my_ city, to _my_ tower." Anthony Stark, genius billionaire, or at least that's what one of Loki's thralls told him. The archer had neglected mentioning that Stark was actually _not _mortal, that he was an Aesir. Loki tried to speak, but the air in his lungs refused to do more than provide him with oxygen. "You steal _my _cube, you threaten _my _people." The other god poured himself a drink. "The arrogance of it." Stark shook his head and took a sip.

Despite being rendered motionless, despite not being able to speak, and being surrounded by unfamiliar spells Loki could not help but feel relieved, because there was an absence of another in his mind. He did not feel the presence that made it hard to breathe. He couldn't feel the pressure on the back of his neck as if a strong hand was gripping him, forcing him to look at the ground.

Loki's mind was his own, but now it was locked in an immobile body.

He wanted to speak, to plead his case to the other god, but Stark was glaring daggers at him and once more Loki knew he'd be punished, tortured, and perhaps this time killed.

"I can't decide if I should pull you apart or send you to Odin's dungeons and let the guards do it for me." Stark continued and Loki felt a shiver race up his back.

_Yes, send me to the All-Father. _Loki wanted to plead. _At least there I'll be safe from Thanos and the Other. _

"I will destroy you for perverting one of my creations." Stark stalked forward, each stride powerful and fueled by rage. Loki could feel the dread filled acceptance settle in his stomach. "I will capture you and I will break you down into little pieces, put you back together, then pull you apart again." Loki understood the words Stark was using, but they didn't make sense to him. He was already captured, already a prisoner.

To say he would be captured was- unless… Unless!

Loki tried not to feel hope bud inside of him. He tried not to let his sudden burst of giddy disbelief cloud his thoughts.

"I will reach through space, through the realms, through the Void," Stark raised his arm, his hand almost touching Loki's face, but a hair's breadth away. "To hook your mind to another's. Are you really so daft as to not see the drawbacks of such a spell?"

Stark's fingers brushed against Loki's cheek with a surprising amount of warmth. Stark's hand trailed down to Loki's neck and the heat started to grow, started to _boil_. He wanted to scream in pain, to pull away, but he couldn't.

Trapped all over again. First in a lifetime of lies, then in Thanos' clutches, and now… and now-

Loki fell to his hands and knees, gasping for air. The hectic breaths quickly changed to painful coughs. His throat was on fire and he was instantly reminded of how the Other forced him to drink some sort of acid before he was flung into this realm.

Loki forced himself to raise his head and was surprised to see his doppelganger walking causally to the balcony, scepter in hand. With a flash of green that he knew usually accompanied him whenever he teleported the doppelganger disappeared.

"What-" Loki's throat was raw and his words were rough. Before he could try again he saw Iron Man take off, entering the fray that now felt so distant to Loki.

He was startled when a hand grabbed him by his upper arm and hefted him up effortlessly. His eyes widened as he saw Stark's expression. The god looked perturbed and tired.

Before Loki could say anything he was dragged then dropped onto a plush couch and a glass was shoved into his hand, full of the same liquid Stark had been drinking earlier.

Loki followed Stark with his eyes as he sat down across from him, a different glass in hand. The Aesir made a hand motion that Loki did not recognize. Colors blurred in front of the other god, before solidifying into the image of a woman.

"Perfect timing." The red headed woman said. "I just found a Cradle in your workshop in London. Do you have the cube back yet?"

"It's in the works." Stark smiled cheekily at the woman and she made an exasperated sound.

"For once would you take something seriously? We wouldn't be in this mess if you bothered to keep track of your things." She scolded him thoroughly, but it only served to make him smile wider.

"Pep, it's not my fault you wanted to go to Jotunheim and my workshop got bombed in your absence."

"And you didn't think to check if any of your things were still intact?" Stark only shrugged in response. "By the Three Sisters! I can't even talk to you right now. Just take this would you." The woman held out an ink black sphere and Stark reached through the image, his hand blurring as he grasped the item then pulled it back. "Call me when you have everything in order so I can start damage control."

"What would I do without you, Pep?" Stark said while eyeing the black sphere.

"Probably accidentally kick off Ragnarök then begin another life where you burden me constantly."

"That is surprisingly accurate."

The woman huffed out a laugh before the image blurred and disintegrated.

Loki watched as Stark raised the sphere to eye level as dark red magic oozed from his fingers, engulfing it. The sphere lit up with golden marking, runes, many of which Loki didn't recognize. The symbols shifted slightly and the sphere turned white.

Stark let it go before performing a spell that Loki was familiar with, a simple displacement spell causing the item to completely disappear. He sunk further into his seat, closing his eyes and leaning his head back.

Loki opened his mouth, but was quickly cut off.

"Don't." Stark said without even opening his eyes. "I'm annoyed with you for leading that inelegant beast to one of my cubes."

Loki didn't know what to say, didn't know what to think. Thanos was out of his head, but his throat felt wrong, like the skin there was too tight.

He stared a moment longer at the Aesir before turning his attention to the battle outside. Whenever one of the Chitauri drew close to the tower they suddenly veered off slightly, a spark of red magic moving them like a spur to a horse. Without warning the various aliens fell from the sky motionless, dead.

* * *

**What do you think? **


	2. The Builder

**Chapter Two: The Builder**

Loki watched the alien invaders fall from the sky like rain drops before he glanced back at Stark. There was a line of concentration on the man's forehead and his eyes were scrunched shut. His grip on his glass was almost damaging.

"Sir," a disembodied voice said, startling Loki, "I have begun changing the flight pattern of the suit to be more erratic to mimic heavy damage in need of immediate repair." Loki looked around frantically trying to identify the source of the voice, but it sounded like it was coming from all directions.

"Good, J. Make sure to relay to the other team members that I'm going straight to the tower and that Loki escaped. Send the corresponding video to Fury."

"Yes, Sir." The voice faded into nothing and a flash of red momentarily blinded Loki. When he could see once more Stark was holding the Tesseract. His lips moved silently, hands glowing dark red. The blue cube expanded and contracted in quick succession before vibrating and fluxing between every color of the rainbow.

There was a spark of red and the Cradle appeared. Stark slowly brought the two items together. As the sphere engulfed the cube it turned an ethereal purple. The shade was so familiar to Loki, but he didn't know why.

Stark cast his brown eyes upon Loki. The younger god froze up, not able to read Stark's expression. He felt a buzzing warmth sweep over him.

"Keep quiet. The other Avengers are coming."

"No, you can't-" He began to stand in protest, but a strong hand quickly pushed him back into his seat.

"Silence young godling. Or should I bind your voice as well?" Stark's voice lacked the anger Loki assumed it would. Instead it almost sounded reprimanding. "I am not giving you to them." He stared up at the other god, utterly confused. Stark carded his fingers through Loki's hair in an almost bemused fashion. It was strangely comforting. "There is no need to worry. As far as they know you have escaped." The world blurred for a moment and a pink box was in Stark's hand. "Here, you look like you could use a little sugar to bring you back to life." Loki was handed the box that read 'Delicious, Delectable, to Die for Donuts'. Inside there was twelve glazed pastries. He hesitantly bit into one and found it to be delightfully sweet, in contrast with the sharp drink he was still holding.

When he was half finished with the box there was a pinging in the distance, causing him to freeze. Muffled voices became coherent. Loki looked towards Stark. The god was completely relaxed, leaning against the bar while pouring another drink.

The archer stumbled in with the assassin's arm slung over his shoulder. The captain was limping and the berserker looked like he was half a step away from passing out. The last to enter the room was the thunderer. The look of disappointment on his face was almost crippling.

Out of all of them Stark was the one who appeared to have fared the best, a dark bruise across the left side of his face had appeared in the brief moment Loki took to look at the other Avengers.

"J, call up Fury. Tell him his favorite boy band has assembled."

"Calling now."

"Super. Feel free to grab a drink if you want one. Food is on the way." Stark said nonchalantly before plopping down beside Loki, slinging his arm over the back of the couch. The younger god tensed up, waiting for the rest of the team to spot him, but they all just took different seats.

An image of a dark skinned man with an eye patch appeared on a black screen in front of him.

"How they hell did you all lose him?!" The man shouted, a vain on his bald head throbbing.

"Director, he disappeared with the Tesseract before we could apprehend him." The assassin reported before taking a large gulp of some unidentified alcohol from a long bottle. Now that she was closer Loki could see her shoulder was dislocated.

A hand brushed across his shoulder, making Loki freeze up before he realized it was only Stark's.

"I think I might have scared the wily wizard away." Stark announced, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. "He was in my penthouse when I came in to change out of my broken suit. We flyted a bit while I stalled for time." The image on screen changed to one of him and Stark standing on opposite sides of the bar, clearly talking. "He tried to use his stick of destiny on me, but my reactor blocked the path of his mojo." The image followed Stark's narration, even though Loki knew that Tony hadn't even moved away from the bar before his spell froze Loki in place. "He tried to cut my throat, but my awesome tech flew to protect me." Loki was knocked aside by a suit of armor before it encased its creator. Stark fired a volley of shots, pushing the fake Loki into a marble wall. The real Loki glanced at the wall where he was supposedly shot. It had scorch marks and the outline of a tall man. On screen the doppelganger fell to his knees before disappearing in a flash of green. "By the time I fought my way to the top of the tower he was there and stole the Tesseract."

"It usually takes more than that to halt my brother." Thor said, a look of concern on his face.

"He did look pretty winded when he popped onto earth." Tony gestured to the screen and it showed Loki arriving from the Tesseract, then cut to him stumbling to sit down in the back of a jeep.

"And how the hell did you get this footage, Stark?" Fury growled out.

"What? I thought this was standard Avenger issued." He said innocently before glancing around the room. "You mean you guys didn't get your copy?"

"You are right, Son of Stark. Loki does look as if he has come from a long quest only to be thrust into another one." Thor said, ignoring Stark's joke.

"Regardless, he still killed many of my agents, mind controlled them, and attacked a US city. We need to find him. A helicopter should be arriving in an hour. Dr. Banner I need you to come to our DC branch and make another one of those Tesseract tracking devices. Agent Romanoff and Agent Barton, what are your conditions?"

"Low on ammo and winded, but we're still field ready." The archer said, glancing at the assassin who nodded in agreement.

"Good, I want you back on the street-"

"Hold on there, Nicky, I have food arriving in-" Stark paused.

"ETA twenty minutes, Sir." The AI reported.

"In twenty minutes. Let them eat and catch their breath then they can go back to being your lackeys."

"Oh sorry, I didn't know you were director of this mother fucking operation. By all means why don't you all go on a little vacation while the rest of the world cleans up this mess?"

"Actually that's a great idea." Tony leaned forward, an excited smile in place. "My surveillance is showing that all the portal aliens are inactive. Your SHEILD agents are already in New York cleaning up the alien. Firefighters are shuttling in from surrounding states to help with the clean up. The police are helping the civilians and I just sent out my suit to help free people from the rubble. Let the heroes catch their breath."

"Stark-"

"Natasha's shoulder is dislocated and her side is bleeding. Clint's wrist is sprained, possibly broken and he's missing a shoe. Bruce is one dull moment away from going into hibernation. The only ones in working order are Capsicle and Flash Gordon."

"I must look for my brother before I attend to your people." The thunderer added in. "I will call on Heimdall and ask if he sees Loki since he is in a weakened state." Loki tensed up, but Stark clasped his shoulder, silently telling him to calm down. He watched as the tall blond left, heading to the patio. "Please alert me shield brothers and sister if any new information arises."

"I can still help." Captain America said, brandishing his shield as if to prove a point.

"Fine, but at least grab a bottle of water and granola bar and eat them in the elevator." Stark waved towards the kitchen and Steve nodded resolutely and left.

"Regardless of all that," Fury cut in, "I'm still sending a helicopter to pick up Dr. Banner."

"Unnecessary. I'm sure we have all the components here. It would waste time for him to leave." Stark waved dismissively.

"Dr. Banner is coming to SHEILD headquarters stat." Fury said with all the authority his position granted him.

"Brucie, do you want to go? I have a feeling that the government really isn't your friend." The berserker glanced from the screen to Tony.

"I think I'll stay here and get started right a way."

"Wonderful! Jarvis can you direct the good doctor to one of the R&D labs and get Dum-E to deliver the necessary parts there."

"Of course, Sir. Dr. Banner if you would enter the elevator. The lab is located on a separate level." Loki watched carefully as Bruce left.

"J, make sure food is sent to him as well."

"All ready done, Sir."

"Super. I don't think there's much else we can do until the tracker is complete. I already have most of the cameras in the city looking for him." Stark glanced at Natasha and Clint."You two look like you could use some rest. Tasha, do you need help popping your shoulder back in place."

"No, I'm just fortifying myself for it." She lifted the bottle up in explanation.

"There are spare bedrooms two floors below. You might want to take a power nap before the food gets here." The archer and assassin looked at each other, the redhead nodding to him. The stood up silently.

"Thank you for your hospitality." Natasha said, in almost an afterthought as they hobbled to the elevator, leaving only Stark and Loki in the room.

"An invisibility spell?" Loki asked.

"No, it was an elf spell that averts eyes. Had they been focusing they could have smelled the sulfur that lingers on your cape and they would have heard the creaking of the leather couch." Stark made a waving motion and the scorch marks on the wall disappeared.

"What did you do to me? Who are you? Why couldn't I sense your magic earlier?" The questions flowered from Loki in quick succession.

Stark glanced to his side at him, fatigue clear in his eyes.

"Not everything is as evident as you may hope it would be." Stark sighed. "Do you really want to talk about this now? I haven't expelled this much energy in decades." Loki jumped up.

"Of course we have to talk about it now! Who are you?! What did you do to me?! Why didn't you hand me over to that bolstering fool Thor?!" He was shaking by the time he finished shouting at Stark. The older god grabbed Loki's wrist and yanked him down so that they were sitting by each other again.

"I have a headache that could cow a bilgesnipe. For the love of all things good please keep your voice down." Stark pressed his cold glass to his forehead, eyes still tightly shut. "Abridged version: you can't sense my magic because it's not like any you've ever come across before, I didn't hand you over to Thor because I need you here for the time being, I bound the tendrils of Thanos' mind to the runes on your neck, and for as to whom I am…" Stark opened his eyes, finally looking at Loki. "In this iteration while in Asgard I went by Ásviðr, more commonly known as The Builder, but in this realm I go by Tony Stark and I am the God of Fortification."

* * *

**God of Fortification... Do you think it fits Tony's personality? **


	3. Civil Discourse

**Chapter Three: Civil Discourse **

"I'm going to take a nap." Stark announced while pulling himself up. "Stay on this floor or the link I have containing Thanos will weaken." Loki watched him go, stunned into silence.

He didn't recognize the name Ásviðr, but he did recognize the moniker The Builder. He had never heard it, but he had felt it, read it as a child. He had been hiding from Thor and his friends after some mischief or another. It was one of the many golden rooms in the castle, but there was only a long alter. Loki had brushed his fingers against the many runes and glyphs carved into the strange structure, then towards the very bottom where the only shadow in the room was cast: _The Builder_.

When he was older he realized it was the room the king went to when he fell into their healing hibernation, the place he rested. It had been given to Búri Odin's grandfather when the castle had finally completed. But that was…

Loki's eyes widened.

That was at least twenty millenniums ago. No being could live that long, not even the drakes of Muspelheim. It was impossible.

But then again it was impossible for a mage as strong as Loki not to be able to sense another with such talent in his proximity, yet somehow he'd missed that fact.

Stark had mentioned that he had bound Thanos's presence with runes on Loki's neck. He glanced around the room. There was a mirror behind the bar. His reflection showed a series of dark red runes woven around his throat, so clustered and small that it almost looked like someone had slit his throat.

Every time he tried to use his magic the runes around his neck flared painfully and his magic rebounded inside of him.

Loki touched the runes. They almost burned under his fingertips, a slight surge of power made him gasp. It was not the familiar magic that usually coursed through his own body nor the searing magic that Stark seemed to use- Instead it was a cold, haunting magic, Thanos' magic. It was only an instant, but it served to remind Loki that his mind was still not his own.

"J?" Loki asked, feeling wary.

"Yes, Mr. Odinson." Loki frowned at his former name.

"I am no son of Odin."

"Yes, the scans confirm that fact. You are of Jotun origin. King Odin is of Aesir origin. I was merely trying to be delicate on the subject." Loki scowled. "Do you have a preferred name that you'd like me to use instead?"

"Loki is just fine."

"Very well, Loki. How may I help you?"

"Who exactly is your master?"

"As Sir stated earlier he is Ásviðr The Builder. He is presently known as Tony Stark and Iron Man. He is the God of Fortification." Jarvis' posh voice answered.

"I have read all the tombs and annals in Asgard's royal library and many of the books in the other royal libraries. There has never been a God of Fortification listed."

"Rightly so, Loki. Paper records do not tend to fair well through Ragnarök, let alone more than one Ragnarök."

"What are you implying?"

"I thought it was quite obvious what I was saying."

"No one can survive Ragnarök."

"My creator, the God of Fortification can and has."

"Impossible."

"Improbable actually."

"And how long have you been with your creator?"

"A very long time, but when there is nothing I sleep so I am uncertain of the exact amount of time. Besides, it becomes difficult to measure time when there is no movement of the planets to measure it by- And by what measurement would I use. A Midgard's minute? An Aesir minute? And what of the other iterations? Each realm, each iteration has its own means of measurement. After a while it just becomes an exercise in futility."

"And what race is he if not Aesir?"

"In the last iteration he was born into a realm that was the equivalent of the current Asgard. For all intents and purposes he is Aesir."

"So even he is Aesir while I am…" Images of blue skin and icy terrain flashed through his mind, accompanied by a feeling of disgust.

"A Jotun, as is Ms. Potts."

"Ms. Potts?"

"The woman Sir was conversing with earlier. She is his partner."

"His partner? And he chose a Jotun?" Loki asked in disbelief.

"When he was young he used to visit the equivalent of Jotunheim. It was his favorite realm to study in."

"What do you mean?"

"There are many things that stay the same during each iteration. One of those things is the grandeur of Jotunheim's library." A blue illusion appeared followed by seven others, all stone like cathedrals. "Unfortunately some disaster or another always befalls them." The images changed to ruins. "The one in this iteration was destroyed by an onslaught of ice."

"What else stays the same?"

"Ms. Potts, no matter which gender, race, or age is always efficient and hard working."

"She does not survive Ragnarök with Stark?"

"That is Ms. Potts' private business."

"Of course." Loki sat at the bar. "What can you tell me about this spell?" He said after a few minutes, touching the runes on his neck.

"It is not a spell I am familiar with."

"Your tone almost implies that not being familiar with one of his spells is an anomaly."

"Very astute of you. I know each of Sir's spells. I must conclude that he created the spell recently. From the symbols I read it is a binding spell."

"I am unfamiliar with many of them."

"Many are not from this iteration. Sir does not feel the need to limit himself to only this one."

"And why is your creator helping me?"

"The main reason? As he stated previously he does not like when people touch his things. The 'Tesseract' as the mortals and Aesir have named it is one of Sir's creations. It has been warped since he last held it. He takes great offense to that."

"I didn't warp it, merely unlocked its ability to open vortexes. Is he going to…" Loki's mind got sidetracked, recent memories of torture flooding his thoughts.

"From what I can gather Sir plans on extracting Thanos from your mind."

"What will he do to me after that?"

"Unknown, but I suggest you do as instructed. Any attempts to leave will be seen as an act of aggression and I'll be forced to restrain you."

"You presume to restrain me? You? A being with no body and no magic?"

"As I already stated I know all of Sir's spells. I also have various reserves of magic independent of Sir and any corporal form." As if in demonstration the room shifted. Loki's heart froze.

"No- No, please no-" Loki gripped his head, panic tearing him up inside. "I was free- I can't be here-"

"Jarvis, restrain yourself." The room shifted again, back to the penthouse. "That's no way to treat a guest. Showing him the place he fears most. Daddy is very disappointed."

"Sorry, Sir. I was merely proving a point."

"Hmm, I can see that. Has the food been delivered yet?" Stark asked, pouring himself a drink.

"Ms. Cook has already delivered it to the kitchen. I had her put it in the refrigerator since you were resting."

"That was an awfully short nap."

"It doesn't take a lot to charge my battery backup." Stark tapped a glowing circle on his chest.

"What is it you have planned for me, Stark, since I'm clearly at a disadvantage here." Loki tried to smile confidently, but he could feel his façade cracking.

"Calm down, Bambi. I'm not going to lie to you. This is going to hurt." Stark moved closer to him and Loki refrained from flinching away. In a quick move the older god grabbed Loki by the back of his neck and pulled him close so that they were eye level with each other. "I'm going to dig into your brain, scrape away at all the filth and lies, see the real you, and then use the link you have to Thanos to pull his mind out of his own damn body and tear it apart." Stark released his grip and Loki jerked backwards. "But first, I need a drink." The older god's tone changed from the edge of insanity to lighthearted so fast Loki almost got whiplash. "So tell me about the Realm Eternal. I felt the Bifrost shatter. What happened?"

Loki flinched at the mention of the rainbow bridge.

"You felt it break?" Loki asked, trying to steer the conversation in a different direction.

"Yeah, I built the golden solarium. I could feel when the web of spells became unwoven." Stark shook his head. "No matter though. It's weaving itself back together again. It will take a decade or two." Loki didn't know why, but knowing that one of Stark's inventions was self repairing was comforting. "You might want to have a drink. This is going to be horribly intimate, both physically and mentally."

"I don't care how intimate or painful it will be. I want him out of my head." Loki said resolutely.

"Good then we're on the same page!" The glass in Stark's hand disappeared. He grabbed Loki by his elbow and dragged him to the couch. "The best thing you can do is relax." Stark plopped down on the couch and Loki stood awkwardly, unsure of what he needed to do. "Horribly intimate." Stark mumbled before quickly yanking Loki down so that he was straddling Stark's thighs. Loki gasped as calloused hands forced him to stare into brown eyes, and then his skull felt like it was splitting open.

* * *

**A lil' more info to set up the story with. Hope you enjoy it :)**


	4. Inner Workings

**Chapter Four: Inner Workings **

It was worse than when Thanos invaded his mind. With Thanos Loki had already been in a weakened state after weeks of physical torture, his mind was already open.

But now, but this time… Loki's mind was almost as sharp as it had been before- before the fall. And that meant that every defense he had erected was being destroyed.

His eyes were being drilled into his skull. Waves of nausea- His breathing was stuttered.

He wanted to shout, to struggle, but once again he was trapped.

The pain was thrashing inside of his skull and all Loki could see was dark brown with flashes of red. A brushing sensation that simultaneously felt like silk and sandpaper.

He felt weak, he felt raw. Completely defenseless- Just like when he was plummeting through the Void, but now he was plummeting in his own mind unable to latch on to a single thought beyond the pain.

Brown eyes that flashed red-

Every piece that made him Loki was tossed aside carelessly- Every façade was destroyed effortlessly by the other god. Each lie Loki had built up to protect himself, to make him stronger-

_No, Loki_.

He screamed, because this pain was worse than the torture. It was worse than falling through the Void.

_No, Loki._

Just two words spoken by the man he considered his father- over and over again.

_I chose you! _Loki wanted to shout to the voice. _I never wanted to be a monster! Can't you see I did this for you?! For mother?! _

_No, Loki._

_I was only following in your footsteps! Killing those monsters as any Aesir would!_

_No, Loki. _

His worst moment relieved a million times over.

_I just wanted to show you-_

_No, Loki. _

_I tried! I swear I tried so hard! _

_No, Loki._

_Why? Why can't you see I just wanted your respect? To be Thor's equal instead of his shadow?_

_No, Loki._

_I don't understand! I chose you! I chose Asgard! Can't you- can't you just for once choose me?_

_No, Loki. _

The voice echoed the same two words in his head until they lost all meaning. The blurry noise cycled and the younger god wasn't sure where the agony was coming from anymore. He only knew was that it was all consuming-

_Hush now, godling. _Another voice whispered. _I've found you a place to rest._

Silence reigned.

The pain ceased.

The faintest of crackling, a fire. Loki could feel its serene warmth.

_If you're just going to fall asleep, wouldn't it be wiser to do so in your own bed? _A kind… a loving voice asked him.

_No, I like sleeping here._ Loki responded while stretching, his fingers brushing against Frigga's favorite pair of silk slippers.

_Very well, my son, but you must roll over. You are using my bag of yarns and threads as a pillow. How am I to finish this tapestry if I cannot use your favorite shade of green to bring the whole image together?_

Loki yawned, taking his time just because he knew it would make Frigga pretend to frown when she really wanted to smile.

_Fine, mother, but I refuse to move an inch further._

Frigga laughed, warming Loki straight to his soul.

Silence.

The crackling of fire.

_If you're just going to fall asleep, wouldn't it be wiser to do so in your own bed?_

The scene began again, and with each subsequent repeat it never lost its warmth, its overwhelming love.

Loki was stuck in that brief moment for what felt like ages, yet not long enough.

He wanted to stay there forever, but a dull ache was pulling him away, pulling him back to reality and the present.

He gasped as his eyes flew open, revealing a high white ceiling. It was spinning and sparks of silver flashed and disappeared. He could feel cold, half dried tears on his face. He felt like an egg that had fallen to the ground, shattered and was oozing its insides everywhere.

After a few harsh, yet calming breaths Loki realized he was laid out on a couch in Stark's penthouse. He carefully touched his neck, but did not feel the flare of heat that used to accompany the motion.

Despite sweat, grainy ash, and dirt covering his skin Loki hadn't felt this clean in what felt like decades. He could no longer detect the tendrils of Thanos' mind in his own.

Whispered words caught his attention. It took almost all his energy to turn onto his side to see the source. Stark, but of course.

Loki was oddly relieved. Seeing Stark meant that his freedom from Thanos wasn't just another dream as he slept in a crumbled heap in a black room.

There was an icy blue mist between Stark's hands. It thrashed restlessly against an invisible barrier. A red ribbon of magic was slowly winding around it, strangling it like a boa.

Loki shivered. He could sense the being contained in the mist, Thanos. Loki half expected the mist to solidify and for Thanos to grab him by his throat and drag him back to the crater they tortured beings in.

The slithering red magic suddenly tightened around the mist and Loki could almost hear Thanos' screams of pain. Loki grinned.

Red claw like daggers appeared on Starks fingers. He dug them into the icy blue mist. The ether burst outwards like a bubble before contracting into a small sphere. With one claw Stark etched into the sphere a tightly woven fractal pattern. The etching turned from dark red to gold before the sphere shattered into small identical cubes.

Stark's hands moved quickly as he pieced the cubes back together again to reform a sphere, this time larger than the last one. He did the process repeatedly, each time the mist fighting less against him and dulling to a pale blue.

Loki's eyes drifted up towards Stark's face. The Aesir had a look of unparalleled concentration on his face. His brown eyes were glowing bright red with magic. His lips whispered silent words. His dark hairline was damp with sweat.

Loki had seen many mages craft spells and runes, but never with such vigor and speed, yet with a finesse that suggested a comprehension of magic that was unheard of.

It was almost hypnotizing, soothing.

Loki felt the exhaustion from the past year slowly creep up on him. The rejection, silent screams, helplessness… He was so tired and the couch beneath him was so soft.

His eyes became bleary.

The mist constricted, burst, contracted, red etching turned gold, shattered to cubes, then put back together again. Repeat.

Somehow it reminded Loki of a lullaby as he drifted to sleep.


	5. Divine Lines

**Chapter Five: Divine Lines**

Loki was slowly pulled out of his rest by the scent of food cooking. He looked towards the source to see a woman in the kitchen. She was… stunning. Taller than the average light elf with black hair that cascaded down her back, silver and golden chains laced in her locks. She wore a soft sage green dress that flowed around her as she moved effortlessly around the kitchen. Her skin glowed ethereally.

She waved her hand towards one of the pots and a golden wave of magic cascaded over the food. Two plates of food appeared in her hands. She glided across the floor and to Loki, handing him one of the plates with a smile.

Hesitantly he took a bite.

Loki wanted to weep. The dish, it smelled, it tasted, it felt just like a meal from his home.

Loki went to thank the woman, but her image dissipated into a red light that faded slowly.

The other plate was on the table between him and Stark.

"Did you get Thanos out of my head?" Loki asked, even though he could feel the absence. Stark was weaving golden threads of magic together with his fingers. Each subsequent twist, loop, and knot was tighter than the last, making the woven parts look solid.

"All traces of him are gone from this realm and all the others. I killed him."

Loki nodded, somewhat disappointed that he didn't get to exact his revenge on the Mad Titan.

Loki reached out for his magic, but it was still bound. He hissed in displeasure.

"Why can't I access my magic?"

"Can't have you disappearing on me. We still have business to attend to."

"And what business would that be?" Loki was itching to run, but knew he wouldn't get far without his powers, especially not against someone like Stark.

"Two things: your mind is still fragile and unstable. I refuse to leave any project in a weakened state. I am the God of Fortification after all." Stark smiled goodheartedly.

"The other reason?" Loki asked cautiously.

"You're the one who fell into the Void." The golden threads disappeared and Stark picked up his plate, surveying the food there.

"How do you know about that?"

"I was in your head, remember Lokes?"

"Why does it matter that I was in that _place_?"

"Jarvis already mentioned to you that certain things happen each iteration. A soul falling into the Void is one of those things." Stark seemed to age right in front of Loki's eyes. "I thought there was more time. I thought I had created more time."

"Shall I inform Ms. Potts, Sir?" Jarvis asked sounding just as tired as his creator.

"No, I'll tell her when she gets here."

"Is that wise? Shouldn't we start preparing?"

"What's happening?" Loki tried reading Stark's expression and didn't like what he saw there. The older god was frowning.

"We can make more time. This is a new opportunity. I won't waste it." Stark said, ignoring Loki's question. "We have at least a decade. I can feel it."

"What does my fall have to do with anything?" Loki's anxiety was creeping up.

"A decade is nothing, Sir. We should just try for the next iteration."

"No, I've already made up my mind."

"Stop ignoring me!" Loki shouted, jumping up to his feet and feeling like a petulant child. Stark looked at him stunned, having completely forgotten about the other god's presence.

"Calm down, Bambi. You'll wake the neighbors."

"Then tell me what's going on."

"You're a link in the chain of events that kick starts Ragnarök."Stark stated plainly. Loki fell back into his seat.

_First Jotunheim, this city, and now all the realms. Monster. _

Loki laughed, a hint of insanity leaking in.

"Of course… Of course! Why not! Of course I'd cause Ragnarök! Who else would be so sick-"

"Woah, hold your reindeer Lokes. No one said you caused it. Falling through the Void is just, uh, sort of a precursor." Stark approached him carefully. "You need to get that self hatred under control. The Jotuns are a fine people. I was a giant for at least seven iterations. Pepper, my right hand lady is a frost giantess. They're people just like the rest of us. There are good ones and bad ones- I can see you don't believe me. Come here." Once again Stark took Loki's head in his hands. As Loki met Stark's brown eyes an icy wind cut through the air.

A light blue hand- _his own_ light blue hand turned a page. The language of the book in front of him was unrecognizable, but the All-Speak allowed him to read it.

_"Njal," a female voice called him._

_"What? You know I'm trying to figure out this spell before my father comes back." I responded, not looking up from the book. _

_"The feast is going to have foreign dignitaries. Don't you want to see them? Have you ever seen a rock giant?"_

_"Of course I have, Asta. You know who my father is. I need to finish this. I swear I'll go to the next feast with you."_

_"You say that every time." In my peripheral I could see delicate purple legs walk in my direction. The raised lines on her skin curved, wrapping around her calves then dipping down to her ankles. Her hands felt warm as they brushed up my arm, tracing my own lines. She settled her hands on my shoulders and began massaging them. _

_"Uck, how do you always hit the right spot?" I could feel my skin contracting, lines rising out of pleasure. _

_"Hmm, I just know you, I guess." Asta draped her arms over my shoulders, leaning against me. "Come on, you don't have to go into the feasting hall." She whispered in my ear. "Just one dance, Njal. You need a break." She kissed my cheek and we both knew my resolve was weakening. "I'll even show you a spell I saw the high priestess perform yesterday." _

_I snapped my book closed. _

_"You've convinced me, but don't blame me if Elhaym ambushes us."_

_"For what you did to her sister, I wouldn't blame her." _

_"Consenting adults, Asta, that's all that matters." I wrapped my arm around her waist before kissing her on the cheek. _

_"You're the worst fiancée imaginable." She said while giggling. _

_"You know I'll be good to you when we're married."_

_"Hmph, we'll see." We linked hands as she led me out of the library. The frozen halls carried music. Carved into the ice were the images of dancing women. _

_Asta leaned against me, humming along with the music. I glanced at her. She was wearing the golden necklace I had bought for her. _

_The sun filtered through the glass ceiling. _

_"You look beautiful tonight."I whispered to her while pulling her into my arms, swaying to the music, cheek to cheek._

_"I look beautiful every night." _

_"On our wedding day you'll be prettier than the high priestess." I could feel her skin contract slightly against my cheek. _

The sensation faded along with the vision.

Brown eyes… Loki jerked backwards, freeing himself from Stark's grip.

"What was that?" Loki asked while gasping.

"One of my past lives."

"No one remembers their past lives." Loki narrowed his eyes at the other god, believing him, yet refusing to voice the sentiment.

"God of Fortification." Stark tapped his temple. "Ragnarök destroys us, leaving behind only our essence, magic, and base characteristics. I just had to strengthen certain aspects of myself and memories that were precious or important so that they wouldn't be destroyed by the time I was reborn." Stark grinned widely. "I also kept a wealth of unique spells and runes that I stumbled upon during my travels."

"So you really don't survive Ragnarök, only your memories survive."

"At first, yes. My furthest back memory is actually me getting a blowjob from a dark elf queen." Stark chuckled. "Figures I'd choose that memory to experiment with."

Loki fell back into his seat.

"So then that was…"

"One of my earliest iterations."

"Then they were no real Jotuns. One was purple after all."

"There's usually slight differences between each iteration. Here, show me your true body and I can prove that they're the same."

"No, I refuse." Loki looked to the side away from Stark. The other god sat beside him on the couch.

"You're a stubborn one, aren't you? You know I could just dispel the glamour for you."

"You violated my mind already. Must you violate my body as well?" Loki asked, still staring out the window. Stark snorted indignantly.

"You royals are always so haughty. Anywho, if I ever 'violate' your body I assure you that it would be consensual and pleasurable for the both of us."

"You're a terrible flirt."

"Not flirting, just a statement of fact. So come on, Lokes. Show me your other skin."

"No, absolutely not."

"I can shape shift into a Jotun if it will make you more comfortable. There's nothing wrong with being a frost giant."

"I don't want to see you as a Jotun, nor do I want to see myself as one."

"You know Loki," Stark's voice changed to deadly serious causing Loki to finally look over at him, "you're going to fall in every iteration. You're going to fall into the Void every time." Loki's back straightened and he balled his hands into fists. "It's just a part of your true essence."

"I don't believe that."

"No, you don't _want_ to believe that. I know the tenor of your magic now. In the next iteration I might be able to get to you before you fall, but there's no guarantee. Years, centuries, millenniums… they just slip away from me sometimes. I already plan on repairing your mind to be as strong as it was before the fall, but if you cooperate I can teach you how to save memories so that in your next life you may be able to avoid falling."

Loki took in a deep breath, trying to calm down. His whole body was shaking. He kept imaging the last glimpse of Asgard he had while falling. It had looked like a golden star, but then in the blink of the eye it was gone and he was truly alone with only his thoughts, confusion, and self-hatred.

"I don't want to fall again." Loki despised how weak he sounded, but then again, the older god had been in his mind. He already knew how weak Loki was.

"Good, then we're in agreement. I haven't had a student other than Pepper in at least thirteen millenniums. We'll have to set down a few ground rules though since your situation is unique considering you're a wanted criminal in at least two realms. Obviously you have to stay under the radar. I'm a hero in this faux-life. I'd have to get a brand new life if they saw I was 'harboring the enemy' and that's just too much of a hassle."

"Understandable, I will endeavor to stay hidden, but I can't use my magic currently to properly hide myself."

"I know. You'll have access to it again soon as your mind is strong enough to handle it again. You're no good to me if you go insane." Stark chuckled and gave Loki a disarming smile. "Another rule: you must not teach anyone else the spells I'm going to teach you. They're too powerful. Having foreknowledge of an iteration they were just born into could give them too much of an advantage. This is nonnegotiable."

Loki stared at Stark for a moment before bursting out laughing.

"You say that like I have someone I could actually tell them to. You've seen inside my head. There is no one I trust, let alone would gift with such power- and if these spells are truly so powerful why are you teaching them to me?" He could feel his suspicion prickle, putting him on alert.

"To stall Ragnarök in this iteration and subsequent iterations. Do you agree or not?"

"Yes, I agree. Are there any other terms?"

"Just one last one. You cannot hate yourself, especially not your Jotun form. Who knows what you'll be in your next life. If you are born Jotun with memories of hating Jotuns do you really think you're going to have a happy life?"

"I don't know if I can… They are- The frost giants are monsters. They kill indiscriminately-" A warm hand touched his shoulder, causing him to flinch.

"Hey now, enough of that." Stark gripped his shoulder comfortingly through Loki's armor. "The Jotun are just like any other race. The last three millenniums have just been hard on them. All those bedtime stories were just that: _stories._ Now release this façade. I don't want to see this false face again until you're comfortable with your real one."

Loki stared down at his perfectly white hands, but they weren't actually perfect. There was dirt and dried blood under his nails. A half healed gash flared painfully on his left palm. Two of his nails were still half grown, recovering from being pulled out by Thanos.

He didn't want these hands. He didn't want the dirt from when he stumbled to the ground nor the blood from when Thanos told him to stab into the mortal. Loki didn't want the gash from when he had stumbled and he never wanted to become Thanos' plaything.

These weren't the hands he wanted, nor the life he had worked so hard for.

"I don't know how to dispel Odin's glamour without using the Casket of Ancient Winters, and even then it's only temporary." Loki said under his breath, still looking at his hands.

"That's okay. Just give me a second to look at the spell." Loki felt a small surge of magic beside him and glanced at Stark. His eyes were glowing red again. His stare was intense, to say the least. It made Loki feel exposed, Loki _was _exposed to this ancient god. "It's a fairly complex glamour, but nowhere close to the stuff Pepper can make."

Loki felt his skin crawl, itch, and tickle all at the same time as the glamour came undone and white shifted to blue. The dirt and blood were still under his now silver fingernails. The red gash on his palm was now dark blue, and two of his nailbeds were still exposed. The same hands, just a different color.

His eyes trailed up his arm, rolling up his sleeves. The raised lines… They were similar to the ones Stark showed him in his vision, but more angular.

"What do they mean?" Loki asked while touching one that split into three at his wrist.

"They don't mean anything, though some Jotun cultures will tell you they are conduits for your magic. They're more for… Well I'll just show you." Stark gently took Loki's arm and turned it so that the softer underside was facing up.

"Why isn't my skin giving you frostbite?" Loki asked, his voice just a whisper.

"It's a defense mechanism. You'll only hurt me if you let your anger or fear overwhelms you." Stark ran a calloused finger on one of the raised lines for a few moments.

"I don't understand. Nothing's happening." He couldn't help but feel disappointed. He was a failure even in his 'natural' form.

"Relax and just wait for it." Loki sighed and leaned back in the chair, trying to ease the tension in his shoulders. He closed his eyes, focusing on the sensation. It wasn't a bad feeling, almost soothing like lazing around in a warm bed. 

It was almost sensual, yet somehow dulled in comparison.

Loki realized that his own breath felt warm on his lips. He licked them and they almost felt too hot.

He felt something inside him shift.

His mind focused on the finger brushing against one of his lines. He could barely feel it now, yet he couldn't think of anything else.

A thumb brushed against the skin between his lines-

Loki gasped and let out a broken moan.

Stark released his arm and Loki suffered from the loss of contact.

His eyes fluttered open.

"What… was that?" Loki felt breathless, warm and cold at the same time.

"Ice giants live in cold windy places. Their skin is thick with the nerve endings hidden from the damaging cold." Stark paused and Loki tried not to squirm in his seat. "When aroused the skin bunches up at the lines, pulling the skin thin, pushing the nerves to the surface." Loki touched the sensitive skin and felt a rush of pleasure. "Only your arm's skin contracted this time, but when the rest does it can be rather maddening, even the slightest movement can-"

"Pardon the interruption, Sir."

"What's up, J?"

"Dr. Banner is requesting your assistance with the construction of the Tesseract locator."

"Tell him I'll be down in a few minutes." Stark glanced over at Loki. "Finish your meal. There's a guest bedroom down the hall and to the left. Feel free to get cleaned up and rest."

Loki watched the other god leave and he tried to calm himself down.


	6. Information

**Chapter Six: Information**

Loki quickly finished his plate of food, savoring every bite. He hadn't had a good meal since before his fall. As a prisoner he was only fed the equivalent of half rotten potatoes. Ever since he arrived in Midgard he had been constantly on the move. The only real food he had were packaged cookies that he found in the helicopter they stole.

He was surprised that his skin hadn't frozen his meal now that he was in _this _form.

Loki set the plate in the sink, feeling oddly sleepy. When he found the guest room he came to a standstill. It looked exactly like his room back home, back in his former home. The same dark wood bedframe, soft black sheets that held in warmth on cold nights and expelled it on warm ones, the toy horse he had whittled as a boy was on his reading desk, his books… all his books. It even smelled like his room back home. The only difference was that the room was a bit smaller and missing two of his windows and the doors were in the wrong places.

He wondered when Stark had the time to cast such a strong and specific spell. Even more than that he wondered how Stark's magic penetrated the protected castle, let alone stole a whole room from it.

The God of Fortification, The Builder… He probably knew the castle better than Loki did, possibly even constructing large parts of it.

Loki shrugged off his armor and clothing wanting nothing more than to get rid of the filth that had accumulated on him in the last year.

It felt strange, feeling the cloth slide off his new, his 'original' skin. It no longer felt over-sensitive, but the texture of his clothing didn't feel as soft as it had in his other form. It dragged against him instead of gliding off. It was no wonder why Jotuns wore so little clothing. Taking it on and off was a hassle.

The bathroom was different than his own, modern and sleek. Loki avoided his reflection, instead figuring out how to use the shower. The hot water he usually favored didn't surprisingly didn't hurt. The warm spray didn't make him feel uncomfortable, but made him even sleepier.

He didn't even have enough time to relish his cleanliness before he collapsed into his bed, falling asleep instantly.

* * *

Loki woke up slowly, nuzzling into his pillow, wondering what would be served in the feasting hall for breakfast-

But this wasn't Asgard, and he was no longer a king nor prince.

"Good morning, Loki. Shall I inform Sir that you are awake?" Jarvis said in a low voice, trying not to startle the god.

"No, not yet." Loki stretched and hated how his skin grated across the soft sheets. "How long have I been asleep?"

"Just shy of three days." Loki was surprised. He hadn't slept at such lengths since he was a child. "Breakfast shall be complete in ten minutes. Would you like to have it served here or in the kitchen?"

"Where is your creator?" Loki asked while staring at his hands. Both his fingernails had grown back and the wound on his palm was completely healed.

"Sir is presently in his lab. You should be aware that Ms. Potts is in the living room. I recommend that you introduce yourself to her."

"Very well. I'll take my breakfast in the kitchen."

Loki changed into some of his less formal clothing before quietly exiting his room. He wished he had access to his magic. He felt exposed and weak without it. If Ms. Potts attacked him he'd only have his physical combat abilities to fall back on. He used to be comfortable in his fighting skills, but since Thanos he felt less sure of himself.

Also, he didn't want the other Jotun to see how small he was.

When he entered the living room he spotted Ms. Potts sitting on one of the armchairs talking on the phone about a business meeting that needed to be rescheduled. She was wearing her human glamour and seemed unperturbed when she saw him, even giving him a friendly wave.

The same mirage woman as before was just finishing cooking as he sat down. She smiled at him while pouring a glass of orange juice.

"Who and what are you?" Loki asked, trying to sound polite despite his overwhelming curiosity.

"Ms. Cook is incapable of speech. She is a combination of spells created by Sir and one of Ms. Potts' previous iterations. She specializes in the culinary arts, but she is well versed in the creation of clothing, first aid, and house cleaning." Ms. Cook set a plate of food in front of him before disappearing in a haze of red magic.

He ate in near silence, only the one sided conversation of Ms. Potts accompanying him. His thoughts drifted. He felt slightly light headed and like he was forgetting something. He chalked that up to the fact that Stark said that his mind was still fragile.

"I must admit that it is strangely comforting to see a fellow Jotun." Ms. Potts said to Loki, pulling him from his thoughts.

"And yet you hide your blue skin."

"I'd shift to my natural state, but I'd just end up tearing my clothes and breaking my shoes." She chuckled. "I'm Pepper Potts. You may call me Pepper. I'm Tony's business partner. We help each other in our various endeavors."

"It is nice to meet you, Pepper. I am Loki. I am very curious about your partner."

"People usually are when they find out about who he really is."

"Exactly how many people actually know who he is?"

"Currently only you and I. Seven millenniums ago when we were staying on Svartalfheim he revealed himself to a man who was a lover from an earlier iteration. Unfortunately when we found him he was very old so Tony only got to spend two decades with him before he died again."

"How did he know it was the same person? I thought each iteration casts us in a different form."

"They do, but Tony recognized his magic and then after a short conversation his personality." Pepper poured herself a cup of coffee. "Oh, that reminds me. Tony wanted me grab a book for you to read. I'll be right back." The clicking of her heels quickly faded. She reappeared a moment later, book in hand. "Reading will help your mind realign itself naturally. It's a Jotun history book. It should be informative even though it's a few thousand years old." The book was surprisingly sturdy for its age. "I'll be in the living room for the next half an hour. If you need anything feel free to ask Jarvis or me."

"Pepper," Loki called out before she left.

"Yes?"

"Why haven't you-" Loki cut himself off, regretting his moment of weakness.

"Why haven't I what?" Pepper asked, tilting her head to the side slightly. Loki could feel his face warm up, annoyed with himself. "No need to be embarrassed. I may not look like it, but I'm Odin's age. Whatever your question is, I can pretty much guarantee that I've heard it before."

"It is not important." Loki waved his hand dismissively at her.

"Is this about you Jotun form? Tony mentioned that you were raised as an Aesir. I know the two realms have a strained relationship as of late."

Loki looked at his nails, wishing they were clear again instead of the unnatural shade of silver they currently were.

"Why haven't you commented on my height?" He finally asked through clenched teeth, refusing to look at the other Jotun.

"Why would I?"

He was annoyed that he was going to have to say, but hid the emotion well.

"Because I am short for a _giant_." He spit out the last word. She didn't respond immediately and he felt like he was insignificant, only good for being ridiculed. Pepper placed a hand on his shoulder and he flinched away.

"You know, the Jotun people did not dub themselves giants. That was what some of the other realms called us. The term eventually caught on. Yes, you are much shorter than the average Jotun, but that's a _good_ thing."

Loki looked at her in a stunned silence. He could not see any deception in her light green eyes. He took in a deep breath, not having realized he had been holding it.

"Why is being a runt a good thing?"

"You're not a runt. The height of a Jotun indicates their proclivity towards magic. Those who have the potential to be great mages tend to be short. They don't need the extra strength that being tall gives the less magically inclined Jotun. It also makes them a smaller target when in battle so that they're less likely to take a physical blow." Pepper smiled at him and Loki could feel his damaged mind reeling. "Your height is absolutely remarkable. I've only seen three other Jotuns that were anywhere near your size and they were all very powerful." She gave him a kind smile. "Just read the book. I'm sure you'll learn a lot of things that will give you a clearer picture on your heritage."

* * *

**A lil' more info on Jotuns, because they're so cool (pun intended). lol**


	7. The Task at Hand

**FYI I posted the sequel to I think, Therefore I Kink. **

* * *

**Chapter Seven: The Task at Hand**

The book on Jotunheim was enlightening, to say the least.

He hadn't been abandoned on the steps of a temple like a misbegotten baby. Magic beyond that of the elemental variety was rare in Jotuns so many parents did not know how to handle a child who had it. All babes with a proclivity towards magic were given to a temple to be raised until they had proper control over their powers, then they were given back to their family. It was normal to swaddle a small baby in the banner of their house then place them in a temple. No Jotun would dare hurt a child, especially not one with talent.

From what Loki gathered it had all been poor timing. They were at war. The priests and priestesses were most likely away from the temple healing the wounded. He had been placed in one of the ice cradles that decorated the front of every temple, but Odin had found him before one of his holy people could take him in.

The knowledge did raise many questions for Loki though.

If his realm was currently at war with enemies so close, why would they leave him defenseless, wearing the banner of the royal family?

Had Odin known he wasn't really abandoned?

Did he know what Loki's small stature truly meant? Or had he taken him specifically because he knew Loki would likely be a strong mage?

He didn't want to think about the circumstances of his adoption/abduction, but he couldn't escape his thoughts. There was no way he could ignore his heritage when his skin was blue. He had a plethora of new information that was impossible to ignore.

Loki wanted to talk to someone about it, to fully _understand_ instead of just believing the rumors, but Pepper had left earlier and he hadn't seen Stark since the day of the battle. That was almost a week ago and his head still felt wrong.

Ms. Cook made him three delicious meals a day and there were Midgard books to take up his time, yet Loki felt like he was at a standstill, like he was waiting for someone to tell him that it was all a big trick- That he was still in that crater screaming in pain as Thanos or the Other tortured him, that this was just some pain induced dream his mind conjured up.

What made it worse was he still couldn't access his magic. Without his magic he wasn't himself. It was all rather frustrating.

Other than seeing Ms. Cook he talked to Jarvis. The incorporeal entity occasionally even told him stories from different iterations. But whenever Loki would ask him about Stark Jarvis would only give curt answers, not telling him about who the god was other than his titles and mentioning a few of the things he had created.

To his surprise Loki felt lonely. Even in Asgard there had been others around, when he was falling he was too scared and confused to be lonely, and while being held prisoner he didn't have the luxury of feeling anything beyond agony, disbelief, and anger.

Now he was alone with his thoughts.

He had time to contemplate his actions as king of Asgard, as their rightful king. He didn't have enough information about how he became a part of House Odin in order to make a proper judgment about the actions of his surrogate parents. Frigga knew he was adopted of course, but that didn't mean she actually knew what he was. He doubted Thor knew. The thunderer was too blunt to keep a secret like that from him.

Loki thought about his short reign, how no one obeyed him, how they disregarded him blindly- And it hurt so much. He might not have had the best of plans, but he was their king, and more than that he was a new king. No newly anointed king was perfect, but they never gave him a chance to… to be a good king.

It was that thought that brought frustrated tears to his eyes. Loki never wanted to be king, but he knew he would have been a good one once he understood why his plan to destroy Jotunheim was foolhearted. He would have been fair to the people even enacting reforms that their economy needed.

But he had been blinded by betrayal, self-hate, and the overwhelming need to just be the son his father always wanted…

He even killed Laufey, the father who may not have abandoned him. For all Loki knew Laufey had mourned the loss of his son… and Loki just killed him without a thought, all for Odin. All for the god who lied to him his whole life.

Loki now had time to think about his fall and subsequent landing. He wasn't certain for how long he fell or was tortured. He hated that he had been completely helpless, that he sang sweet promises of retrieving the Tesseract if only Thanos would give him his own realm.

He hadn't known about Thanos' ability to latch onto his mind. He had planned on just disappearing, never returning to the father who was disappointed in him, just disappearing, starting a new life in a different realm.

Maybe he would have chosen Midgard. Its population was greater than any of the other realms. One more person would surely go unnoticed.

But then Thanos was in his head and any dissention would mean his mind and body would be pulled apart with no chance of recovery. So Loki had played his part, making a grand entrance and causing enough chaos to draw the attention of Heimdall or Odin in order for them to retrieve him. When Odin had only sent Thor for the Tesseract it had hurt and Loki almost wanted to destroy Midgard to show he wouldn't be ignored. He had pushed that emotion down though, instead opting to create a bottlenecked invasion point. He even stalled long enough for the 'heroes' to get to New York before he unleashed the Chitauri.

Loki knew that Thor would insist he'd be punished in Asgard. Then when he was finally home, if it could be considered home, Odin would notice the Mad Titan in Loki's mind and hopefully have some sort of spell to banish him.

But that never happened. Stark happened instead.

Loki went through so much pain, a lifetime of lies and he never wanted to experience that again. Not in this lifetime or in any of his next.

The news that he fell in each life was disturbing and made him laugh madly while crying. The nothingness of the Void… and he had to endure it every iteration.

How the Norns loved to weave a cruel fate!

That's why he wanted the help of the God of Fortification. He wanted to carry the knowledge of his inevitable fall onto his next life so he could hopefully change his fate. Even if he was suspicious of Stark's motives for wanting to teach him they couldn't be as bad as falling through the Void again.

The older god also piqued Loki's curiosity. Having such a wealth of knowledge was rather appealing to Loki. He had always wondered how the rainbow bridge worked and now he was acquainted with the god who made it.

Stark had also known about the function of the skin ridges Jotuns had even though the book Loki read did not state it.

Such intellect was very attractive to Loki.

Pepper had mentioned that Stark's last lover male so that wouldn't be an issue. Well it really shouldn't be an issue if what Stark said about being different genders in different iterations was true.

Stark had mentioned that he was a version of Aesir, yet his mortal glamour was quite convincing. Loki ached with curiosity to see how the older god really looked.

But it had been a week since they officially met and Loki still hadn't seen the other god again. The two times he asked Jarvis why that was the case he would just say that his creator was busy.

Loki hated being ignored, even if it wasn't on purpose.

Just as Loki was heading to his room to retire for the night he heard the pinging of the elevator. He stilled and looked towards the hallway, unsure if he should hide in case it wasn't Stark or Pepper.

In the corner of his eye Loki saw Ms. Cook appear. He relaxed. Jarvis would never summon her if a mortal was here.

"Hey Lokes." Stark said while yawning. He collapsed on one of the barstools in the kitchen, leaning heavily on the counter. "Wanna do me a favor and grab me a bottle of scotch and glass from the bar." Loki nodded, silently retrieving said articles. "Thanks." He poured himself a large glass, downing half of it in one go before filling it again.

"Any progress on your Tesseract locating device?" Loki asked, sitting beside him.

"Yeah, no, we finished that days ago. It works perfectly, but now my cube has a different energy signature and isn't in this realm so they won't find it." Stark grinned while taking a sip. "Thor left yesterday. He was hoping that you'd be too exhausted to travel between realms, but as time passed he figured the chances of you still being here were less and less likely."

"It is good to know that he won't be close enough to sense my magic once you unbind it."

"Oh… that's what that post-it note was about! Yeah, sorry I forgot." Stark said with a sheepish grin and Loki smothered his annoyance. "Let me just see if your mind is up to task." Tony gripped Loki's chin. "Don't worry. It won't be as painful this time. You ready?"

"Ready enough." Loki responded, bracing himself.

Stark's brown eyes flared red before Loki was blinded by pain. Just as quickly as it started it ended. When his eyes and mind were his own again Loki realized he was slumped forward and Stark was gripping his upper arm to keep him from falling off his stool.

"Yup, your mind has recouped enough to handle magic." Stark said while helping Loki sit back up. "And may I just say that your mind is much more orderly than the other ones I've explored. It made things much easier."

"Thank you, now will you release my magic?" He was more than a bit anxious to get it back.

"Just a second. I need to heal my hands." Loki looked at the older god's hands in confusion. They were black as if-

"I did that to you." He stated, not knowing how to feel about accidentally giving someone frostbite.

"It's my fault. I should have been expecting it. I doubt you've had any real practice trying to control it." Stark shrugged. Ms. Cook rummaged through one of the cabinets before pulling out a jar. Loki quickly recognized the contents as healing stones. She handed one to Stark who crushed it in his palm. The black, broken skin quickly knitted back together and shifted to a lighter color.

Loki raised an eyebrow, impressed. It would have taken at least three of Asgard's healing stones to do that and even then the results would be much slower. He wanted to ask Stark which specific properties made it so much more effective than the kind Loki was used to, but there were more important matters to be addressed.

After dusting the last of the healing stone away Stark placed a hand on Loki's neck, over the ring of runes. He did not say any words of power, merely stared at Loki's neck. The magic binding him receded into Stark's palm.

Loki's own magic uncurled itself inside of him like a listless snake. It spread throughout him with a rejuvenating force that made him almost feel like his old self, like the man he was before the coronation.

He tried a few spells to make sure everything was as it should be. He could feel Stark's eyes on him as the older god ate. Loki wondered what must be going through his mind. Would Loki's spells look like child's play? Was he listing everything that was wrong with the spells, knowing how to do them bigger and better?

It made Loki annoyingly self conscious.

"Better?" Stark asked while finishing his meal.

"Much better." His magic was actually stronger and he wondered if it was because he was in his natural form. "When do we get started on strengthening my memories?"

"I suppose tonight even though it's been a long week. When I wasn't playing my role as a mortal going to meetings, public appearances, and the like I was trying to repair my cube. If I go another day without sleep some of my distant spells may weaken." Stark said while handing Ms. Cook his dirty plate. She put it in the dishwasher before disappearing. "Here," Stark conjured up the woven golden threads he had been working on last time they spoke and handed it to Loki. It turned grey and lost its shimmer. "These are regular threads. As you weave them together focus on imbuing them with your magic. Think of the threads as a part of you. That will make it easier. Your goal is to have the thread retain your active magic without you concentrating on it. When you can do that we'll move on to the next step."

Stark gave a brief wave while heading to his room.

Loki stared at the threads and frowned. The task sounded easy, but he had a feeling that it was anything but.

* * *

**Accidentally giving people frostbite #JotunProblems lol  
**


	8. Hidden Message

**Chapter Eight: Hidden Message  
**

The task at hand was impossibly hard. Loki had imbued countless weapons with his magic, but that magic had always been inactive, only flaring back to life when commanded to do so or hit with magic.

The actual weaving aspect was at first cumbersome, but his clever fingers quickly picked up the rhythm.

When Loki imbued the threads with his active energy he had to focus so that it wouldn't dissipate now that it wasn't anchored to him. If his concentration wavered even a second he had to start all over again.

Stark advised him to think of the threads as a part of him, but he didn't know how to do so. Perhaps if the item he was trying to imbue was one of his daggers it would be easier since he already considered it a part of himself. But Stark had been very specific on which object Loki should focus his energies on. He had studied under many mages before and if there was one thing he learned it was that they hated when their directions were disregarded.

Loki only realized it was morning when Ms. Cook placed a plate of pancakes in front of him. He nodded in thanks, but did not touch them.

An hour later he heard Stark leave his room. Loki refused to let his frustration show as the older god walked by him, not even glancing in his direction.

He did his best to ignore the noise of Ms. Cook doing her duty then the subsequent clinking of utensils against a plate.

He wove in silence letting the magic run from his fingertips into the threads. His magic just wouldn't stick. As soon as the thread turned green it was back to grey.

"Will it distract you if I work up here?" Stark asked from behind him

"No," Loki lied, refusing to show any more weakness than he already had. Stark sat across from him, resting his feet on the coffee table. With a lazy hand motion the Cradle, as Pepper called it, appeared and separated from the Tesseract. Stark set the Cradle beside him before holding the Tesseract loosely, eyes closed.

Loki could not sense him doing anything to the cube, but he was sure that Stark was. Every few minutes the Tesseract would shudder. Loki tried not to stare, but his eyes drifted to the strange Aesir and the object he held.

When Loki finally gave up trying to figure out what Stark was doing and concentrated back on the threads there was a flash of gold. His eyes snapped back to Stark. The Tesseract was alight with red runes. What was more startling though was Stark's look of absolute fury.

"Jarvis, inform Pep that I won't be back till tomorrow evening." Stark said while putting down the Tesseract on the coffee table, still glowing.

"Very well, Sir. Would you like to give a reason for your absence?"

"Tell her I finally found the son of a bitch who took my cube from Asgard and lost it on Midgard."

"Shall I prepare a cell?"

"No, I don't think they were aware of what they were doing, but I have to be certain. He wasted a few centuries that could have been important." As Stark stood up his image shifted, turning him into a dark elf.

"Safe travels, Sir."

"Thanks, J."

Before Loki could ask him what exactly was going on the God of Fortification disappeared.

Loki sighed in frustration before going back to imbuing the threads. The lasted a full five minutes before his gaze lingered on the Tesseract sitting only two feet away, still glowing brightly. He glared at it. It was Stark's active magic, not even flickering slightly despite its creator most likely being in a whole other realm. Loki could hardly make his active magic stick to the threads for a second, yet Stark could keep his active magic in an object from a different realm.

It was both frustrating and motivating. If it was possible than it surely was within Loki's capabilities.

* * *

Despite his surge in confidence half a day later Loki still had not made any progress.

_Think of the threads as a part of you._

That was Stark's advice, but how could he? Loki didn't feel pain when he pulled the threads tightly. It was string. Not a part of him.

He decided to take a break since he could hear Ms. Cook making him lunch. He wondered into the kitchen feeling his fatigue from constantly using his magic and having not slept the night before.

Two weeks ago he was screaming in a crater. Now he was watching a beautiful ghost of a woman make him soup. Loki chuckled and tried not to think about where he'd be in two more weeks. A good portion of Midgard was looking for him, some of which were probably in this tower. Thor was definitely still looking for him. He didn't know how many on Asgard even knew he was alive. He hoped that Frigga did. Even if she had lied about his origins he knew that she loved him like a son.

Frigga… she had been there in the memory Stark put him in while extracting Thanos from his mind.

She had mentioned threads.

When he was a young boy she seemed to always be weaving or embroidering something.

Loki looked at Ms. Cook gauging how much longer till the food would be finished. Deciding that it still had a ways to go he went to his room and stared at the tapestry Frigga had made for him. It was simple compared to most of the ones she made.

The background was a shade of green that was so dark it almost looked black. Around the edges were the constellations, the sun, and moons of Asgard. Then in the middle was a perfect representation of the golden city.

He reached out to brush the delicate stitches but froze when he saw his blue skin. A Jotun touching Asgard. The concept felt wrong and absurd.

He had to remind himself that he was Loki and this was the place he was raised. Just because he wasn't born there didn't mean it wasn't his home.

Loki carefully traced the image of the tower his mother was most likely sitting in at this very moment.

When he fell… when he let go he had not considered how she would be affected. Had Odin told her the truth that he chose to die? Or had he lied to her? Did she even know he invaded Midgard? It wouldn't surprise Loki if Odin had decided not to tell her in case Loki wasn't captured.

Frigga had always put so much work into each tapestry. She put her love into them and even said that… they were a part of her.

Loki paused, his hand still resting on the fabric. This was a part of her. He hesitated before sending out a gentle pulse of magic. He felt it bounce back surrounded by cornflower blue magic, his mother's magic. Hidden runes flared to life.

He almost cried when he deciphered their meaning. They were intricate spells to give him good luck, safety, fortune, and most of all happiness. A message of love hidden right in front of him for most of his life.

Loki blinked back his tears watching the blue runes fade, becoming hidden once more.

It was inactive magic, but it did give him a better idea on how to imbue his active magic as he wove the threads together.

He went back to the living room, retrieving the threads and immediately going to work on them.

It wasn't about incorporating the threads into his being. He had been trying to force the threads to be a part of him instead of actually believing that they were. They were an extension of him. It was about using them like they were a part of him, giving them a purpose beyond an exercise. Giving them purpose the same way Frigga gave every stitch a bit of her love.

After that realization each attempt got him closer to success.

* * *

**Added a few feels. Hope you don't mind :)  
**


	9. A Little Closer

**Chapter Nine:**

Loki woke up on the couch to the afternoon sun bright in his eyes. His fingers were still tangled in threads. He frowned when he saw that they were grey. Not that he had really expected them to last the whole night.

The best he had done was when the thread stayed green for five minutes without him having to manipulate them.

It was slow progress, but progress none the less.

He hadn't struggle with learning a new spellcraft in centuries. It was simultaneously pleasing and frustrating.

After untangling himself from the threads he went to his room and got cleaned up. He was once again startled by his blue appearance. The surprise wasn't accompanied by his usual disgust though. It seemed that he was getting used to this form.

There was a hardy sandwich waiting for him after his shower. He had no idea how Ms. Cook seemed to always know what he wanted to eat. It should concern him, but considering the fact that Stark had been in his mind multiple times he wasn't too worried about Stark's creation doing any damage.

He decided that once he learned how to strengthen his memories he would ask Stark about what combination of spells came together to create such a being. Where ever he went after this, surely a cook would be useful.

Loki stared at the Tesseract as he ate. He was tempted to examine it properly, but wasn't sure how it would react to his magic, or for that matter how Stark and Jarvis would react to him touching it.

The runes that he could read seemed to be unrelated to each other. Runes for binding, protection, absorption, restraint, longevity, growth, patience, and even one for hope. He couldn't decipher what they could mean all together.

Loki had used the Tesseract as a means of opening a portal, but he now doubted that was its intended purpose.

He shook his head and went on to his exercise with the threads. The weaving aspect had become almost therapeutic and had long ago become automatic. Weaving required the same amount of thought as it took to blink. The threads were an extension of himself and he made them dance while they slowly began to glow green.

Loki's whole attention was on the task at hand as the sun set so when a flash of red and loud crack emanated from right in front of him. He automatically went into battle mode summoning four throwing daggers. He threw the first two at the dark elf as he vaulted over the back of the couch. The elf quickly blocked them with his long axe, which was covered with blood. He was about to toss the other two when the elf spoke.

"Relax, Lokes. It's just me." The elf's features shifted back into Stark's. Loki let out a breath remembering that the older god had left disguised as a dark elf yesterday. "Geez, talk about a warm welcoming." Stark made a sweeping motion with his hand and the blood on the axe disappeared.

"Sorry. You startled me." Loki said while displacing his daggers.

"Evidentially." Stark plopped down onto a chair with little grace, letting the axe rest on his legs. "How goes the weaving?" Loki stared at the axe admiring its fine crafting.

"It is progressing. I understand the concept. It is only a matter of time before I master it." Loki said confidently and Stark grinned. "How did your hunt go?"

"It was a success. Asgard has a few holes in her security that the dark elves know about. If you ever decide to go back there I can make you a list."

"That could buy me a bit of good will, but I doubt I'll be going there anytime soon." Loki shrugged, not really wanting to think about his home, his former home.

"Either way." Stark summoned a pen and paper and wrote for a few minutes. He let go of the paper and it glided to Loki's hand. The younger god glanced over it and was surprised by how many weaknesses the dark elves had known about and how many he didn't know about.

"Aren't you worried that I'll use this for some sort of mischief?"

"Mischief isn't necessarily a bad thing. Besides I think you'd much rather help that realm than hinder it." Stark examined the edge of his axe as he spoke. His eyes were discerning.

"Perhaps," Loki stored the note away, undecided on what to do with it. Stark seemed unconcerned. Loki figured that if he had seen whole realms grow, flourish, and then be destroyed multiple times that he wouldn't be concerned by a bit of mischief.

Stark pulled out a whetstone from his pocket and began sharpening the axe. Every few strokes he would stop and examine the edge.

Loki idly wondered if that was the reason Stark was the God of Fortification. The man never seemed to stay still. He was always tweaking something, making it sharper, stronger, faster…

He continued watching the other god while working on the threads. Loki found the slight distraction to actually be useful. With more than one thing to focus on the whole act of imbuing the threads felt more natural to him.

As the night dragged on Ms. Cook set down two plates of food for the gods, both of which ignored the food instead focusing on their own endeavors.

Stark seemed to have a whole vault of weapons somewhere. When he finished adjusting one weapon he went onto the next. Many of the devices Loki didn't recognize. One in particular looked odd to him. It was a long chain with a small weight on the end. Each link was sharpened into a blade. He didn't see any way someone could handle the weapon without cutting themselves. Stark only took off two links and changed the weight on the end, all the while gathering knicks on his palms.

"I was told," Loki said, looking away from his weaving, "that in this realm you once were a weapons manufacture. That you came from a long line of weapon manufactures." Stark did not look away from the three barreled hand gun he was pulling apart, but he did respond.

"The realm that is situated in the very middle of the tree always lacks magic. The last seven iterations I decided to spend time slowly developing their weapons so that they can have a fighting chance when they encounter outside forces."

"So I would have won if not for you?" Loki joked, glancing at his work. He was pleased to see that it was still glowing strongly.

"It would have been a hollow victory and short lived. This realm is always the first one to be destroyed by Ragnarök."

"You sound so certain of that." Loki may not be the sanest of creatures, but he was hoping to live a very long life.

"Statistics, Lokes. They're a bitch." Loki frowned. The fact that the other god had quantifiable evidence on the subject matter was disturbing. Loki was still trying to figure out just how old the God of Fortification was. He spoke of iterations the way the Aesir spoke of centuries. Loki could see the faint glowing on Stark's chest. The media attributed it to a kidnapping, but Loki doubted anyone could kidnap Stark unless he wanted to be taken. "Lokes."

"Hm?"

"Your concentration is slipping." Stark pointed towards the threads just as they turned grey.

"Damn."


	10. Learning About You and Me

**Chapter Ten: Learning About You and Me**

"I wish to know more about you." Loki said a few days later, sitting down in front of the God of Fortification. He could now successively sustain active magic in the threads for almost an hour and a half.

"There's not much to know." Stark said with a shrug before taking a sip of his scotch. Loki scoffed loudly.

"You've lived and remember countless lives and you say there is not much to know? Surely you jest." Loki made a flippant gesture.

"I don't remember all my lives, just the important bits. Besides, after a while all the details become trivial." Loki could see a hint of well hidden sadness in Stark's eyes.

"I cannot claim to understand, but I doubt much if any of it was trivial."

"Maybe." He set down his glass. "I'm going down to the lab. Would you like to join me?"

"Won't there be mortals there?"

"No, my lab is private. Bruce is still in the tower, but I gave him his own lab. He won't bother us."

"Alright. I have been wondering what your lab looks like." Loki reached for the glowing threads on the table.

"Leave it. The distance will give you another challenge since you're progressing nicely." Loki was taken aback slightly by the complement. The older god had only given him one other, and that was to complement the orderliness of his mind.

"You give good advice and I've always enjoyed learning." Loki followed Stark into an elevator.

"A rare quality. Once I learn something I have to see if I can put the knowledge to use." Stark chuckled, scrubbing a hand over his goatee. "It's gotten me in trouble many times."

"May I have an example?"

"Dragons are ticklish. I was a fire giant, I think. The factoid had come up while I was drinking with a group of dwarves. I of course had to test to see if this was the case. The only dragon I knew about was owned by the queen of the realm. I snuck into the palace fairly easily and started tickling the dragon. It twitched like crazy and let out what was clearly laughter. I should have expected those laughs would be accompanied by fire. It didn't affect me of course do to my race. What the dwarves failed to tell me was that if you tickle a dragon for more than a minute it starts suffocating. Moral of the story: If you want to kill a dragon quickly tickle it."

Loki grinned widely.

"I honestly hope I get to utilize this information. Dragons are not easily sleighed. As a boy I dreamed of-" Loki cut himself off.

"Yes?" Stark inquired.

"Pardon me. I'm just finding it difficult to believe that I used to be that person. I was just so overwhelmingly foolish and naive. I can scarcely believe that is who I used to be." Loki shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts.

"Trust me when I say I understand. In one iteration I was born in a whore house on Alfheim. I knew Ragnarök would come eventually, but I decided to live a peaceful life. I never went further than twenty miles away from that city for my whole 3000 years. I was the highest paid prostitute there and eventually became the madam of the place. I was renowned in all nine realms. Legends of my abilities even filtered to Midgard. Now look at me. I travel all the realms freely and I'm seen as a great hero." Stark paused and gave Loki a thoughtful look. "Things change, often for the better if you want them to."

Loki wanted to believe that Stark was just talking about the next iteration, but he had a feeling that he was talking about this lifetime, about his former life on Asgard.

"I plan on living this life to the fullest. I do not want to live in captivity."

"There is one tried and true way to stay free while being wherever you want to be."

"And what exactly is that method?"

"You just have to be so valuable that it would hinder them and their pursuits if you were hurt or imprisoned."

"How do you suggest I do that?"

"Do you want to return to Asgard?"

"I want to be able to see my mother freely. I want to get the truth from Odin."

"I have a solution for the latter part. Once I have fixed my cube and put it back in the Cradle I have to take it back to Asgard so that it can perform its function. If you came with me no one would dare stop you." Loki frowned as the elevator decended. From what Loki has seen Stark was likely to hold sway over such matters. Perhaps he finally could get the truth from Odin.

"Why are you trying to help me? I understand why you want me to strengthen my mind, but I don't understand why you'd help me beyond that."

"I assure you that I have purely selfish reasons."

"That's a hollow answer if I've ever heard one."

Loki could almost feel Stark considering him as they walked into the lab. Loki wanted to know what the other god was hiding, but knew pushing the subject would probably hinder that process.

Loki tried not to be amazed by all the technology, but he could not contain his admiration when Stark opened a hidden door revealing another lab with artifacts of legend, devices that surely did wonders, and active magic imbuing so many things.

"This place is amazing." Loki said while cautiously touching a vase that glowed. In an instant he was in a whole other world, one filled with a variety of flowers that graced the air with their scent. Before he could panic Stark appeared and tugged him back to the lab.

"I didn't think I'd have to tell you not to touch anything."

"Sorry. I may have been a bit overzealous."

"It's alright. It's an endearing feature." Stark flicked a gyroscope to life and strange music emitted from it. "Any item in particular that you want to know about."

"The Tesseract."

"Other than that one."

"It seems more important to you than the other items."

"That's because it is."

"And you're not going to tell me why?"

"Not yet at least. I don't trust you enough."

"Yet you're willing to teach me how to keep my memories for my next iterations."

"As I stated. It's only for selfish reasons." Stark shrugged, picking up an oblong tool and tossing it between his hands. It changed colors every time he caught it. "So is there any other item you want to know about before I start tinkering."

"Yes, what is glowing in your chest?"

"You're good at asking about the most interesting things." Stark tapped the item in question.

"I was always good at finding the pertinent information."

"I suppose you do deserve a bit of a reward for your impressive progress." Stark took off his shirt, revealing the strange object imbedded in his chest. "I'm sure you've noticed that my magic has two colors: red and gold." Stark brushed the object and the light went from faint blue to gold. "I met a mage in multiple iterations and he always had a terrible life. In one iteration I decided to take pity on him and teach him how to keep his past knowledge so that he wouldn't make the same mistakes and wouldn't be so trusting of others. Unfortunately the Norns abused him in every iteration regardless of what he did.

"Eight iterations later he sought me out and begged me to help him die a permanent death so that he would no longer have to suffer. When I say suffer I really mean suffer. Each iteration he was constantly beaten, raped, tortured, betrayed, his children were killed out of spite, and a slew of other horrible things. I was his only friend in all the realms, but I didn't know how to really kill someone permanently. We spent a few years trying to figure it out, but one day when I was in another realm bandits broke into the house we shared and killed him. It was extremely fucked up. It was twenty-five millenniums later that we met again. He had the same request and by then I had a solution.

"This device is a trap of sorts. It only worked because we were both willing. He imbued all his active magic into it and when he was done he died. I haven't sensed him in any iteration since." Stark brushed the object again and the magic inside appeared light blue.

"You have access to his magic." Loki stated as Stark pulled his shirt back on.

"Yeah, and he always had a larger reserve of magic then I did. It's really helped me out. Also it's nice to have the presence of someone else with me. When all the realms are destroyed it can be rather lonely with only Jarvis and Ms. Cook to keep me company."

"That must have taken a lot of trust on his part."

"Hey, you let me into your head multiple times. That takes a lot of trust." Loki chuckled.

"I let you in for selfish reasons. I wanted to be free and now I want to be stronger." Loki frowned. "I do find it quite annoying that I don't know your full reasoning for helping me."

"I guess I can give you one reason."Stark glanced at the ceiling before looking back at Loki and smiling. "I find you exceptionally good looking and interesting." Stark's grin widened, tilting his head slightly to the side. "Your magic dissipated from the threads. It seems that arousal distracts you immensely."

Loki pouted slightly, unsure if he should be annoyed that he had once again failed at his task or happy that the other god found him attractive. He settled on the latter.

* * *

**I also posted an alternative start to this fic called Hidden Path, in case you're interested. **


	11. Divided City

**Chapter Eleven: Divided City  
**

Loki sat in silence, watching the other god tinker. He seemed to favor working on multiple projects at once, moving around the large room quickly and effortlessly. The Tesseract was outside of its Cradle again. Periodically Stark would pause and touch it, shifting runes on it or merely letting his magic glide over it.

Loki was drowning in curiosity, but tried to subdue the feeling. He knew that it would take time for the other god to trust him enough to divulge the function of the Tesseract.

Instead he tried focusing on imbuing the threads from afar. He could sense them as if they were a part of himself, which in a way they were. It was only in his body that his active magic resided. Now his body just had a new part, woven threads.

It was very strange to consider something so small and trivial as a part of himself, but now they were and he felt fiercely protective of them. He hadn't been this attached to an inanimate object since his first dagger.

The feeling gave Loki a better idea on why Stark had been so angry that someone had messed with the Tesseract. He had no doubt that whoever removed it from Asgard was now very much dead.

To have a part of him warped against his will, Loki knew the feeling all too well. It was no small wonder that Stark had been angry at Thanos.

Stark suddenly paused mid spell. Loki cocked his head to the side. The red energy dissipated from his hands and the strange noises of the machines and items Stark was working with silenced.

"It seems I have another reason I should be annoyed with you." Stark said as the items around him whirred back to life.

"What did I do this time?" He hated being blamed for things that weren't his fault.

"My cube on Jotunheim was damaged recently, within the last three years. I hadn't noticed till just now."

"I had no intentions of harming your property."

"Yeah, you just wanted to destroy the whole realm."

"I was misguided and naïve." Loki really didn't want to discuss this, but he saw no way around it.

"I know. That's the only reason you're still alive."

"You would dispose of me so easily?" He felt a weight settle in the pit of his stomach. Was he always so easily dismissed?

"You misunderstand, godling. Your mind wasn't the only one I entered. Thanos would have had you tortured then fed to his dogs if you were how you are now. He wanted a puppet, but you are no longer fit to be one." Stark waved dismissively, turning back to one of his projects. "Once I am finished with this I'll be leaving for Jotunheim. You should come with me and see the damage you have done."

"I do not think that is a wise idea."

"You can't hide from your past."

"That is not why I don't want to go. Have you forgotten that I'm trying to avoid imprisonment and torture?"

"I doubt anyone will recognize you, let alone figure out who you are. Besides I know the tenor of your magic. So long as I know which realm you're in I can find you easily." Stark glanced at the Tesseract before fusing it back with the Cradle and displacing it. "Weren't you talking earlier about building some good will? I might know a few spells that will repair some of the destruction you caused."

"I doubt the All-Father would see it as good will, helping his age old enemies."

"He didn't want you to destroy their whole realm. He must have his reasons. I'm fairly certain that the All-Father will see you helping a realm you hindered as a good thing."

"Fine. How long will the trip be?"

"Less than a day if things aren't too chaotic. I'll go in a Jotun form to make things a bit simpler." Loki glanced backwards as he heard a shuffling noise. Ms. Cook was walking in with clothing under her arm and two plates in her hands. She gave her usual smile as she set the items down. "Eat up. Food on Jotunheim is notoriously bland."

Loki slowly ate, not wanting to think about the coming trip. His first trip to Jotunheim had more or less been a disaster even if it was of his own making. In the back of his head he was still fighting between what he had been taught about frost giants in Asgard and the information in the book he read. He was still not certain which category he belonged to: monster or merely as imperfect as all the other immortals.

A part of him hoped that he would find the acceptance there that he never got on Asgard. According to the book Pepper had given him Jotun society was disbursed, only yielding to the authority of their religious leaders. That called into question any birthright he may have had if there was technically no monarchy on the planet.

He wasn't a prince of Asgard. He wasn't a prince of Jotunheim. He was just a mage who had fallen through the Void and attacked a realm, possibly a footnote in the annals of history at most. On the other hand he apparently had some sort of connection with Ragnarök, so there's that.

Loki was so lost in his thoughts that he hadn't even noticed the older god shift into a Jotun form, a good two feet taller than Loki.

"You'll stand out if you're that short." Stark said, no inflection in his tone, just stating a fact. "Can you shape shift or use a glamour? If not Pepper is upstairs and illusions are her specialty."

"No, I can shape shift. Just give me a moment. I've never tried to be a…" Loki shook his head.

"Alright, I'm going to grab a few things from upstairs. The elevator is using an express protocol so you won't run into anyone. Just head up when you're ready." Stark ducked slightly under the doorframe as he left, seemingly comfortable in his new form.

Loki pictured himself and his now familiar blue features as he stripped out of his Aesir clothes. He did a quick measurement of the Jotun clothes that had been left for him. Shape shifting was one of his specialties though he rarely got a chance to utilize it. He rolled his shoulders a few times and tried to relax. Slowly his body shifted, his limbs growing longer and a bit bulkier. His spine stretched upwards, taking his ribs with them. For good measure he changed his facial features a bit, but couldn't bring himself to change the pattern on his skin. For some reason he rather liked them, now that they didn't invoke disgust.

After inspecting himself and being pleased with the results Loki put on the simple leather loincloth that dipped down the front and back, yet left the sides of legs completely exposed. He clasped on the velvet black cape, appreciating the golden chain used to fasten it in place.

A stray thought left him curious if this is the sort of thing he would have usually worn if he had never been taken from Jotunheim. He let the thought pass, not wanting to dwell on such matters.

Loki quickly decided that he didn't like being this tall. He could already tell that it would hinder is versatility and slow him down.

His head just barely touched the top of the elevator and he wondered if his long hair would be acceptable in Jotun culture. He had not considered the locks, really hadn't had the time to, since before everything happened.

The longer hair made him feel even less like who he used to be, but he that wasn't necessarily a bad thing.

Stark was idly spinning a war axe in his hand, the same one he had come back with bloodied. Loki assumed it must be his weapon of choice, contrasting greatly with the Iron Man suit that had projectile-based weapons. He let the axe fly and dance in the air for an instant before catching it left handedly.

"Just a few more things and we'll look like proper Jotuns." Stark said while performing a displacement spell with only one hand, impressing Loki. A slew of golden ornaments appeared. Stark handed Loki his axe to hold while he clasped a necklace on Loki, his fingers brushing the base of his neck. Loki was slightly miffed with the distant clinical look in the older god's eyes as he laced thin golden chains around Loki's waist, having them hang down the front of the loincloth.

"I am uncertain that they wear these sorts of things. On my single visit they did not have so much jewelry on."

"Those Jotuns were in the military. We're going to a city and a temple." Stark said while adorning himself. Loki handed him back his axe.

"Should I bring a weapon?" Loki asked, idly wondering where exactly his staff was.

"No, this is more of a… calling card. I expect we won't run into much trouble." He brushed a thumb over the edge of the axe, careful not to cut himself. "If you want to bring one Pepper said that Jotuns tend to favor the long-spear." Another one handed displacement spell, an ornate spear appearing. "Here." Stark handed it to him and Loki tested its balance while admiring its craftsmen ship. The shaft was of dimpled uru that would easily be mistaken for a lesser material. The base was slightly larger with a knob of silver and the blade looked positively _wicked_. The edge seemed to catch the light on the curved blade that hooked at the very end. "I wouldn't recommend toting that one around though. Most Jotun don't carry weapons."

"Then why give it to me. I have my own stock of weapons."

"True, but they're all Aesir weapons I'd assume." Loki pictured his own spear. It was definitely not as long as this one and reeked of Asgard.

"Point taken. How are we traveling? Is there a branch of the tree nearby or do you have other means?" Teleportation between realms could kill a mage who lacked enough magic. Very few had enough skill to perform such an act.

"Have you forgotten that I made the Bifrost?" Stark pulled out a golden ball from his bag, no larger than his own hand. He brushed his thumb against the rough surface, activating a spell Loki didn't recognize before dropping it between them. Loki was not prepared for what happened next.

He could no longer sense his own body. It was as if it never existed. Yet he could feel _everything_, he was a part of _everything_. The distinction between him and every other being blurred. He wanted to weep. He wanted to chuckle.

Most of all Loki wanted to feel like this forever, to never be alone again, to be a part of everything, thus actually being something instead of just the one who fell-

And then it was over.

The ball bounced on impact with the icy terrain and Stark caught it, quickly putting the object back away.

"That was… very unexpected." Loki said, at a loss for words.

"I've been told it gives people a new perspective."

"Yes, that describes it perfectly. I do believe that my next attempt at imbuing active magic will be much more successful."

"Good, just don't get lost. If you put too much of yourself into an inanimate object you'll die." Stark tapped the spot on his chest where the ball of magic must have been hidden. Loki nodded in understanding before surveying his surroundings.

They were a few miles away from a large city. It almost looked like a mirage and he snorted when he realized it was a silver city, a fitting contrast to the golden one he had grown up in.

The landscape was speckled with low shrubs with waxy, dark green leaves. There were a few houses that seemed to jut out of the ice between them and the city.

What was most fascinating was the road they had landed on. Not surprisingly it was made of ice, which his bare feet easily treaded on. Instead of a simple outline to lead the way figures were carved into the road.

"Why would they… surely this road becomes covered every time it snows." Loki said as they started walking towards the city. The images seemed to be playing out some sort of story.

"This part of Jotunheim is a frozen desert. It never snows in this region unless a large storm from the south makes its way over the mountain." Stark said nonchalantly.

Loki glanced at the houses as he passed them by. They were large and made of some sort of dark blue ice.

Through one of the windows (technically just holes in the wall to let in light) he spotted a female Jotun nursing a baby. They made eye contact, red meeting red, and she smiled at him with a nod before going back to watching her swaddled baby.

It was very domestic and Loki didn't really know how to interpret it. He focused back on the road. The images seemed to be about a family with seven children that became distant from each other as they grew older. In turn each of the siblings had some sort of problem they could not solve on their own and ended up going to one of their other siblings for help.

By the time they reached the city the family was back together again and very happy.

The story struck a chord in Loki, which he smothered quickly.

The silver city was a sight to behold. Icy spires thinner than Loki pierced the clear sky. Every building had its own unique design carved on its walls. The contrast from building to building was amazing. They all looked different, yet seemed to work perfectly together.

After gaping in a very uncouth manner Loki noticed that something was wrong with the city.

"Where is everybody?" Loki asked, his voice a whisper in the silent city. Stark frowned, but did not answer, only holding his axe a bit tighter.

Loki kept casting his gaze around, searching for any sort of movement. He wanted to send out a pulse of energy to widen his senses, but knew that could be a bad idea if it hit any destructive inactive magic.

He faltered mid-step.

Destruction.

It was like the city had been cut in half. On one side was the pristine empty city while on the other was a blighted expanse of ice and rubble.

_This_ is what he had done to this realm.

Buildings were destroyed. The ground had gouges deep enough to come up to Loki's waist even in his elongated state. The devastation stretched as far as the eye could see.

Loki could barely breathe as he stared at the line where his attack had come to an abrupt end. Looking to the right- the city was perfect. Looking to the left- only ruin.

A hand on his shoulder made him flinch. Stark pointed and Loki followed the gesture, answering Loki's earlier question. Far in the distance there was a large crowd of Jotuns.

Loki cast a simple spell to temporarily enhance his eyesight.

It was- They were-

He broke down into sobs, not being able to handle it.

Loki was awash with conflicting emotions. He was disgusted with himself for causing such ruin. He hated Odin for ever letting him believe that Jotuns were somehow less than Aesir. Despite that he was infinitely grateful for Odin and Thor stopping his ill advised attack on Jotunheim.

He had done this. First Jotunheim and then Midgard. What would he destroy next? Asgard? Alfheim? Niflhiem?

Strong arms pulled him up and into an embrace.

"Hey, what did I tell you about self-hatred?" Stark said softly while running a hand up and down Loki's back. It only made Loki cry harder. "Come on. Let's go inside. I have a spell or two that may help them out." Loki held on to the older god a moment longer before composing himself.

Stark led him to a half destroyed building and Loki kept his eyes on his feet, unable to handle seeing the countless Jotun working together to repair the damage he had done.


	12. Eyes on the Horizon

**Chapter Twelve: Eyes on the Horizon**

"We ask for shelter for the night so that we may help come tomorrow." Stark said and Loki looked up. The God of Fortification was talking to a Jotun woman who appeared to be ancient and a foot shorter than the average Jotun.

The woman sat unmoving and at first Loki thought she didn't hear Stark. He was proven wrong when she flicked her finger and a set of large doors opened.

They both gave their thanks before entering the ornate, half destroyed building. It was different than the other buildings. The light seemed to cast no shadows and came from nowhere in particular.

Another door to their left opened and Stark did not hesitate in entering it. The room was sparse, only containing a nice sized bed and nightstand.

Stark sat down on the bed, leaning against the headboard, gesturing for Loki to do the same. The God of Fortification rummaged through his bag. Loki noticed that he had displaced his axe at some point.

"Tell me you have some sort of plan to fix all this."

"More or less, though it can't really be fixed only repaired and prevented."

"Prevented?"

"Well, not prevented in this iteration, but possibly in the next one. I do not know if the attack on Jotunheim is always done by one of your iterations."

"It happens… every iteration?" Loki's dread was back full force.

"Not every time. Sometimes Ragnarök comes before destruction is laid upon it." Stark sounded dispassionate. He pulled out a light pink bottle. He uncorked it and sniffed the contents hesitantly. His scrunched up expression made it clear that Stark did not like what he found. "It will have to do."

He tapped his fingers against the bottle a few times. Red magic rippled over the glass. When he lifted it to his nose again the liquid inside of it was clear. He took a sip and frowned.

"You might want to get some rest. This is going to take me a bit." Stark said without looking away from the bottle. Loki grabbed one of the pillows, making himself comfortable. He wasn't planning on falling asleep. Seeing foreign magic and spells was too interesting to miss.

Stark's spells always seemed to skip over the usual methods that channeled magic. Most of his hand movements looked unconscious.

"May I…" Loki frowned, changing tactics midsentence. "I want to know what you're doing." Loki said more firmly. Stark gave him a curious look before smiling.

"Alright, Bambi. I'm not opposed to sharing." The room seemed to light up with tendrils of red and gold magic. The ribbons all originated from Stark's hands, reaching out to touch everything around him. Loki could feel them warmly brushing up against him. A few peeked under the door. "Right now I'm getting a feel for the composition of the things around me." The ribbons caressed him and he shivered at the sensation. They pulled away from him. "Once I know what the land is made of I just have to adapt this lovely brew to mimic it. I'm thinking of forcing the potion into a vapor. Make it into a Christmas miracle."

"Christmas?"

"A holiday on Midgard. Pretty much I'm going to make it snow. Actually you're going to make it snow. I'm going to go to sleep." The ribbons retracted lightning fast, the liquid in the bottle glowed red. "Give me your hand." Loki did so. "This is going to feel super weird for you." There was a tugging, a _leeching_ feeling. His vision grayed at the edges. He felt his body go limp, the only thing that felt solid was the hand holding his own.

"What…" Loki could barely form the word. A bolt of energy made him gasp and lurch up.

"Easy, Lokes." A distant voice told him. Loki fell on side against the bed. His eyesight came back.

"My magic…" He reached out weakly. The bottle was glowing green, _his_ green.

"Had to take a bit of your magic. You don't have enough practice to make your active magic stick to something like this." Stark corked the bottle. "You should be up and running by nightfall if you rest." Stark gently pulled the blanket out from under him before pulling it up to his chin. "I have to do a few things, but I won't be gone long."

"No…" He couldn't just leave him here defenseless and in a land filled with people who would love to kill him.

"Don't worry. I'll ward the room." Stark said in a low voice, his expression unreadable. Loki sighed in relief, shifting in the bed to get comfortable before falling asleep.

* * *

A dip in the bed roused Loki from unconsciousness.

The room was dark save for the glowing bottle on the nightstand.

From the scent of the new occupant Loki knew it was Stark, though he did not know why he knew the other God's scent so easily.

In the dim light he could tell Stark was holding a sphere, similar to the Cradle, but tinged green instead of hazy purple. Loki could tell Stark was manipulating the orb. His focus was on a crack that blemished it. Dull waves of red pulsed over it, only visible due to the darkness of the room.

He wanted to move closer, to feel the power of Stark's magic. It was strange how compelling the need to get closer was. Perhaps it was because the magic was familiar. It had rushed through him more than once. It had pulled him out of slavery and mindless destruction.

Despite his pride Loki pushed himself flush with Stark's leg, resting his head on Stark's thigh. His uncertainty was eased when Stark adjusted the blankets, bringing Loki closer.

His hand rested lightly on Stark's leg. He was tempted to trace his raised lines, but figured it may be an unwelcomed gesture considering the older god was so focused on the sphere in his hands.

Instead, Loki drifted off back to sleep, enjoying the physical contact.

* * *

"Bambi, it's time."

A hand gently shook his shoulder. Loki pressed his head further into his pillow, fighting consciousness.

The hand drifted to his neck then the base of his head before brushing through his hair.

"Lokes, if you want to help the Jotun people it has to be now. The city is asleep." Loki reluctantly sat up. Stark handed him the bottle that was still glowing. "This shouldn't be difficult for you to use. Just will it to disburse over the damaged land. Once it's spread let your control of it go." Loki nodded in understanding. "It will be easier if you go to the top of the temple and release it from there."

"Which temple?"

"The one we're in right now. Just go down the hall and you'll find the stairwell."

After climbing over Stark to get out of bed Loki followed his directions and found himself high above the world. As he felt his cape brush the ground Loki realized that in his sleep he had shifted back to his usual height. That didn't bother him though. His thoughts were caught up on the three realms he could possibly consider home.

Asgard's night sky was dark purple, Midgard's navy blue, but Jotun's was the same deep shade of green of Loki's magic.

The city behind him glittered faintly while the destruction in front of him looked like a black hole, an open maw waiting to swallow him up. It reminded him too much of the Void and he could scarcely look at it for more than a moment, but he had to if he wanted to repair it.

Taking a deep breath Loki let the potion escape the bottle. It slowly wound its way into the air, continuously expanding- with it Loki could feel himself growing bigger, felt himself stretching over the land.

A sentiment… this was his land, in the tenderest of ways.

This was his land… and he had to heal it the way he so often healed his physical wounds.

When the green cloud touched the horizon Loki released his hold over it. The verdant flickered once before it dissipated. Loki frowned, thinking that he had somehow messed up the spell. Then he saw the snow. The flakes were as large as his fists, yet fell as if they were feathers.

He couldn't look away from it, even though he felt like he was losing a large part of himself.

Loki couldn't say how long he stood there in his natural Jotun form, encased in Jotun clothing. It was beautiful and if the Norns had just shifted their plans slightly this is how he could have lived his whole life, admiring the serene landscape and feeling at peace.

Yet, it left him feeling hollow.

This was not his life and the grand feat he just performed was facilitated and orchestrated by another.

He was a fugitive in three of the realms, a mass murderer, a toy, and above all else he was doomed to fall through the Void in each iteration.

Such a pitiful life filled with confusion, self-hatred, and anger.

Loki looked down at his feet, no longer wanting to see the snow falling. He shuffled slightly, feeling uncomfortable in his own skin before going back inside.

Stark was asleep, sprawled out on one side of the bed, not having dropped his form in his unconscious state.

Loki felt small compared to him, both physically and ability-wise.

This older god was trying to help him though, trying to give Loki the tools to not fall into the Void again.

Loki settled in beside him and sighed. In this bed, nestled against the other god and burrowed under blankets things didn't feel so bad. He almost wished that he could stay in this moment forever.

* * *

**I posted another Tony as a god fic called Our Paths Unfold. It will eventually be a Tony/Loki story, in case you're interested. **


	13. It is the Frost

**Chapter Thirteen: It is the Frost**

Loki and Stark woke up to a dull noise that was slowly building up outside.

Stark merely huffed and pulled a pillow over his head, blocking out the ruckus. Loki's curiosity was not so easily stifled. He shape shifted himself taller before wondering back to the roof to get a view of the commotion.

Once again Loki was at a loss for words.

Below him countless Jotuns were using their elemental magic to harden the snow that filled up the pocked land. Among them were children of all ages, some helping while the less experienced ones packed the snow down with their hands.

Where the city brushed against destruction stood many Jotuns male and females holding infants and passing food and drinks to the Jotuns who wondered over to them.

No one noticed him so far above.

"Are you satisfied?" Stark asked from behind him, startling Loki. The God of Fortification was surprisingly silent on his feet. Very few people were capable of sneaking up on Loki.

"No, but I feel a little bit better. I would like to go and help them further."

"That's understandable, but a bad idea. The whole area reeks of your magic. If you go out there they'll know it was you." Stark stood beside him, looking down at the crowd. "They'd hail you as hero. You're no hero." Loki couldn't argue with that. "If any Jotun is here from your first visit to this realm they may recognize the magic as belonging to one of the Aesir that attacked them then figure out you're from Asgard."

"How long will it take for my traces to fade?"

"A year at most." Stark shrugged before turning to go back into the half wrecked temple.

"When the Aesir search this realm, they'll know I was here. What I have done." Loki said under his breath.

"Wasn't that kinda the point?"

"Perhaps." Loki stared a moment longer before joining Stark inside.

"Our business here is concluded. We should leave before anyone gets close enough to pick up your tenor of magic." Stark grabbed his bag and the orb from earlier was gone. The elderly Jotun woman who had granted them access to the temple was sitting in the same spot as before, seemingly having never moved. "We thank you for this shelter."

Loki echoed the sentiment and the elderly woman gave them a sincere smile. Loki wondered if she perhaps knew they were behind the sudden snowfall. It was unlikely, but her short stature spoke of her real power.

He glanced away from her to the face of the temple.

Stark kept walking a couple paces before he realized his companion was no longer beside him. He backtracked to see what was distracting Loki.

The God of Mischief could not pull his eyes away from the small niche seamlessly carved into the front of the temple. He ghosted his fingers over the silver furs, his throat constricting with emotion.

"Is this…" He couldn't finish the sentence.

"Yes, this is the place parents leave gifted babies to be taken in by the church. Though I believe the one you were left in is far to the east."

The crib was carved from ice, yet padded with furs and the softest pillow Loki had ever felt.

"I wasn't abandoned…"

"I already told you that you weren't. Whether your adopted father knew the significant of his action we won't know till later." Stark pulled him away from the temple. "Come on. You can do the whole introspect thing when we're back and I have a glass of scotch in hand." Loki reluctantly fell in step with him his eyes trained on his bare feet as he tried to piece together everything.

When they reached the edge of the city where the story-walkway began it had changed, showing a new tale. Loki watched it to keep himself distracted. It was a story of growth. A snow fox getting lost in a blizzard overcoming adversity after adversity. Just as they came to the spot of their arrival the story ended with the fox finding its mate.

Stark bounced the golden ball and it was just like the last time. The same sense of being part of everything washed over Loki and ended far too quickly.

The second Stark caught the ball he walked off to his room, dropping the bag by one of the couches while mumbling about scotch.

Loki shrunk back down to his usual height before heading to his own room. His automatically went to the tapestry of Asgard, sending out a pulse of magic into it, feeling Frigga's inactive magic flare in response. He hoped that it somehow got to her, told her that he was alright.

He took a shower and donned Aesir apparel. He almost missed the scant Jotun clothing when he felt the Aesir cloth grate annoyingly against his skin.

Stark was laid out on the couch a bottle of scotch in one hand and a blurred image of Pepper in the other.

"No, Tony. Yeah, I'm scared, but we should just pack up shop. It will take at least a year for us to gather all your toys on Midgard- and don't get me started on your toys on Helheim! I don't mind gathering most the cubes, but I won't be responsible for your ray guns and hover targets."

"Uck! Pep, they're not ray guns and you know it. How many times have I saved your life? Why do you have so little faith in me?" Stark pouted at her. Loki took the seat across from him, picking up his threads.

"It doesn't count if you're the one who almost killed me!"

"I'm really not seeing the distinction."

"You wouldn't. Just be at the meeting tomorrow at ten. No excuses." Pepper said strictly and Stark took a swig straight from the bottle. "And stop celebrating! Director Fury was looking for you yesterday. Leave one of your drunk shades here next time so he'll leave with less of a fuss."

"You're such a joy-kill."

"Why am I the adult?" She asked in exasperation, tucking a stray strand of her hair behind her ear.

"It's funny because you say that to me every iteration."

"Goodbye, Tony." Before he could respond the image disappeared. Stark took another swig before setting down the bottle onto the coffee table.

"What are you celebrating?" Loki asked while easily imbuing his active magic in the threads he was weaving together.

"My brilliance, my sheer genius, my-"

"Inflated ego."

"That too." Stark sat up. "It's time to up the difficulty of your task." The God of Fortification grabbed his bag from beside the couch. "You've been focusing on solid objects, but memories are anything but. Since you moved so quickly we'll skip liquids and move onto imbuing active magic to vapor."

"How exactly will this strengthen my memories?"

"Magic and your own core characteristics are the only things that survive Ragnarök. Strengthen a memory with your magic- make it a part of your magic and you'll be able to keep it in the next iteration." Stark pulled out a small golden apple and shined it. "Get it?"

"Got it. What vapor am I imbuing?" Loki asked while displacing the threads. They were a part of him now and he wasn't going to give them up. Stark flicked the half empty bottle of scotch, a spark of red went through the drink, turning it into its gas form.

"For now I'll keep the vapor contained in one spot. Once you get the hang of it I'll set it loose." Loki carefully picked up the decanter, examining the twisting mist inside of it.

"How many steps are there before my memories are secured?"

"This is the second of three."

"And the next one is?"

"Harder than the last one."

"You have a way with saying a lot without giving any actual information away."

"I told you how many steps there were." Stark preformed a quick displacement spell and a lit cigar appeared in his hand as he took a bite of apple. "I've gotten you this far, haven't I?" Loki pursed his lips, not satisfied with the answer, but knew he'd get nothing more from the god. Instead he focused on the bottle in his hand. "Let me know if I'm distracting you." Stark said while breathing out cloying tendrils of smoke. Red and gold intermingled in the haze before solidifying into an Iron Man racing around Stark's head. Another breath out and another one with its colors inverted appeared. They began battling while Stark moved his finger from side to side like a conductor.

It was distracting, but Loki refused to let that keep him from his goal.

The mind expanding trip to and from Jotunheim had given him a better understanding on what it meant to not be confined by his own physical form. His body was just a vessel, the same way the bottle he was holding was a vessel for the vapor. Each iteration he'd get a new vessel. He just had to keep the contents the same.

Yet he couldn't focus.

His eyes drifted to the window, to the destruction he wrought upon this realm. How much worse would it have been if not for Stark? What if the invasion had succeeded? Would Loki have ever gotten his mind back?

He tries not to think about what may have happened and what he'll do after Stark finishes teaching him all he wants to. Ragnarök was close. Stark made that clear. Loki didn't want to die, even knowing that he'd come back in the next iteration, but then Loki wouldn't be Loki. He was going to lose so much of himself.

Loki wondered if Stark really would seek him out next iteration, to keep him from falling again.

A sense of hopelessness overcame him.

Ragnarök… Loki had known since he was a boy that it would come and destroy the realms and then he'd be reborn into a new life, but the way Stark talked about iterations… Everything would just be on repeat. He'd be born into a new body then spend his whole life trying to escape his fate of falling into the Void only to die and start all over again.

Knowing the end was close, knowing what would happen in his next life it was depressing and made everything feel futile.

"Stark," Loki said before he could stop himself, "how can you stand it, knowing that everyone is going to die soon? Already knowing what's going to happen next? I only know just the smallest amount, yet I can feel it fray at my sanity." Stark didn't respond immediately, instead looking at the cigar in his hand.

"My divine inclination is to strengthen things." Loki could tell Stark was measuring his words carefully. "That urge, that _need_ covers a lot of things. I spend a good portion of my day binding my memories, my thoughts to my magic. Staying sane is hard. You know what Ragnarök is, but you have no idea what happens after it.

"Ragnarök is the frost that kills all the leaves on Yggdrasil. It is only the start of a barren winter. For countless years there are only two things in the universe, Yggdrasil and me. The first time I survived I was unprepared. I didn't understand what it would mean to live in that land of nothing. You may be the only one who can understand. If I wasn't looking at my own hands or the tree there was nothing to look at but the Void. I was surrounded by it with only the branches of the tree to cling onto. There was no food. There was no air. All I could do was dig my nails into unyielding bark, trying to find a place to hold on because there is no gravity if I let go for just one second I could drift off. I didn't even last a decade I… as you'd put it 'let go'."

"What happened at the end of your next iteration?"

"I was better prepared." Stark took a huff of his cigar before letting out the smoke. An image of the Yggdrasil appeared, all in gold.

"Why face such isolation? Why survive Ragnarök if your memories will be preserved regardless?" Loki asked, knowing Stark was still holding back. The Void was merciless. The idea of willingly facing it for so long sounded like pure insanity.

Stark's whole expression fell, but he quickly put a façade in place.

"Another time, Lokes. Just focus on imbuing the vapor with your magic."


	14. The Joys of Being a Jotun

**Chapter Fourteen: The Joys of Being a Jotun**

Loki hadn't seen Stark in three days. He felt strangely alone, despite being used to long bouts of isolation in the pursuit of advancing his magic.

Pepper had stopped by once complementing his progress and asking how Jotunheim was doing. Loki could barely look at her as he spoke of the damage he inflicted and the small positive impact he made while trying to help. She had patted him on the shoulder with a small smile that spoke of forgiveness and understanding.

Imbuing the vapor was getting easier, mostly because of how his mind expanded both during his trip to and from Jotunheim and when he was controlling the cloud before letting it snow.

Loki released the vapor from the bottle and tried to control it the same way Stark had done so with his cigar smoke. At first he could barely keep the vapor from dissipating, but after a few choice swear words under his breath he got it under control.

The first images he could create were vague smudges, then blurred shapes, before finally become definable images- all in green.

He found this form of imbuing to be much harder than the previous way. His energy dissipated from the vapor quicker than it did from a solid object. The idea of making his memories, something so incorporeal, into a part of his magic seemed impossible, but if Stark could do it Loki was sure he could too.

* * *

Loki had fallen asleep on the couch again, the bottle lightly clasped in his hands. His magic was bordering on dangerously low, but he felt safe enough in Stark's home to let himself become this weak.

"Fury wants answers." A low, female voice said, alerting him to another's presence.

"As a scientist I can appreciate that urge." Stark responded flippantly. From his spot Loki was in the peripheral vision of the red headed assassin. He felt a tinge of panic until red words appeared in front of him.

_She can't see you_.

"Tony, we're still on high alert after the invasion. Fury and Hill both think he's going to come back for round two. We need to know we can trust you to have our backs." From the look of annoyance on Stark's face it was clear that they had been discussing this for far too long.

Loki silently stood up and walked to the hallway, simultaneously putting on the glamour of a young, beautiful woman with mussed hair only wearing one of Stark's button up shirts. She emerged from the hallway, purposefully being louder than she actually was. Loki pretended not to see the Widow's hand flash to her holster. Loki yawned in response, her bare feet paddling softly across the cold tile floor. The assassin was watching her closely as Loki poured a cup of coffee before leaning against Stark. The older god quickly looped his arm around her waist.

"Good morning." Loki said before taking a sip of coffee and giving the other woman the once over. "And you are?"

"I could ask the same of you. She hasn't passed through security and I doubt she's been holed up here since before the invasion." The SHEILD agent accused. Stark snorted.

"You think I don't have ways around my own security?"

"I'm guessing she's the reason you've been out of contact?" Natasha's lips were drawn into a thin line.

"I've been told I can be quite time consuming." Loki let out an undignified squeak as Stark suddenly lifted her by her hips and sat her on the counter, before positioning himself between her legs. He gave Loki a fleeting questioning look and the younger god nodded subtly.

"Unless you want to join us I suggest you tell Fury to mind his own damn business. I flew a nuclear missile into a wormhole. I think I deserve a bit of a break." Stark grinded obscenely against Loki as he spoke. Loki let out a gasp before pulling him closer.

"Some things never change with you." The assassin said unfazed by their crude display. She left without another word.

Stark slid his hands up Loki's legs.

"I can see why you are the God of Mischief." Stark leered at Loki's fake form. "You're very pretty like this, but I'd prefer you in your real form." Stark whispered while kissing Loki's cheek and running a hand up his side.

"I might burn you on accident." He pulled at Loki's hair, exposing his neck.

"Only if you feel defensive. Am I making you feel defensive?" Stark asks in his usual teasing manner and Loki shivered under his touch.

"No." Loki arched his back, bringing him closer to the older god.

"Then let me see your real form, let me touch you in your real form." With every word Stark's lips brushed against Loki's skin. The younger god let his glamour slip and immediately felt the contrast of their temperatures. "You've never really been touched in your Jotun form. This will be quite the experience for you." Loki could feel his skin already contracting, exposing his nerves that amplified every touch. "Hmm, but what should we do? There are so many options. I could fuck you till you forget your name," Stark pushed Loki onto his back as he started to strip him down. "Fuck you till your lines spasm, your body not knowing if it can handle another orgasm." The blue skin of his chest was revealed. Stark stared at the four lines that started on Loki's back and followed the curve of his ribs before sharply turning downward before disappearing below more cloth. "You know, I don't even have to take off these leather pants you tend to favor to make you come undone. What do you think about that?"

"Anything just-" Stark flicked his tongue out on Loki's collarbone. Pleasure swept outwards from that spot, yet it was contained, never passing over his raised lines, like flowing water contained by a river.

Loki could suddenly feel everything. The calluses on Stark's hands, the cold granite counter at his back, the leather rubbing up against his skin, Stark's warm breath-

"Ah!" His whole body tensed with just the slightest of touches when Stark brushed his thumbs over Loki's hips.

"Yes, I think I'll leave you untouched. I'll make you come again and again without being inside of you or touching you where you need it the most." Stark bit down hard on Loki's neck, and the younger god let out a strangled gasp. He turned his head to give Stark better access, but the feeling of his cheek brushing against the smooth granite was almost just as painful, making him feel light headed.

Loki tried pawing at Stark's shirt in hopes of touching his skin, but the feeling of the soft fabric on his fingertips was almost too much-

He hooked his legs around Stark's hips and cried out as his leather dragged against his skin. His ankles hooked together and the soft inlining of his boots almost burned him with the intensity

"Oh, Norns, Stark- I don't understand- I can't-" Loki couldn't form sentences, making Stark grin. He ran his tongue between the lines of his chest and stomach before circling around Loki's navel.

Everything hurt, but felt so good. He was quivering and the wet trail Stark left behind was aching. Loki wanted more, but he could barely move without a pleasure that was just on the precipice of a climax made him lock up, leaving him completely open and vulnerable to the other god.

Every old knick and callous on Stark's hands grated against Loki's skin sending waves of hysteria through him.

And Stark's goatee scratched against his dark blue nipple-

Loki wanted to cry, because he couldn't process it all- it was too much, but not enough.

With one hand Stark traced the V of Loki's hips while the other reached behind him and pulled Loki flush with him.

Then their lips met and the pleasure somehow amplified. Loki could barely respond to Stark's fervent kisses and nips purely because he was not certain he'd be able to survive the fall that would come after the climax he was quickly building up to.

Loki didn't realize he was trying to grind his hips against Stark's until the other god pushed them back down onto the counter. He whimpered in response.

"Please, Stark- Please!" Loki begged, wantonly rubbing his torso against Starks, his whole body feeling like it would explode with just one well placed touch.

"Not tonight." Stark whispered into his ear, the soft brush of his breath making Loki cry out.

"Please!" Tears escaped his eyes and they blazed a path across his skin.

Stark's shirt rubbing against him, the soft fur of his boots, his slick leather, and Stark's rough skin-

It all made Loki's whole body pulse right on a level of pleasure he'd never experienced before. He was so close to shattering into a million pieces-

And then Stark bit down on the column of his neck-

Loki screamed. His whole body tensed and came undone. Loki was completely lost in the sensation. He couldn't see or move and the all encompassing pleasure didn't relent. All he could do was quiver under the onslaught as the orgasm hit him repeatedly.

Slowly the pleasure ebbed. Loki realized that he was breathing harshly as he looked at Stark with hooded eyes.

"Do you still know your name?" Stark asked, still hovering over him, yet leaving an inch between them.

"Yes- Loki." He said disjointedly.

"Good, that means I'm still not done with you." And then the process started all over again.

* * *

**So that just happened. Fyi, I posted a one-shot about baby!Loki called From the Heart.  
**


	15. Light Conversation

**Chapter Fifteen: Light Conversation**

Loki woke up in his own bed in a daze. He stretched and the feeling of his skin against the sheets was almost painful. Actually, his whole body was bordering on painful. Presently he was sore all over. His muscles ached and he felt dehydrated.

He had vague memories of how he ended up in his own bed. He knew Stark carried his boneless, panting form from the kitchen to his room, then laying him down.

Loki shifted and noticed he was nude, strange considering he tended to wear long lounge pants while asleep.

The memory became clearer.

Stark pulling off Loki's pants.

Loki distinctly remembered thinking: _Finally, finally! But it's not fair. I'm too tired to even lift my eyes, let alone fuck. _

It hadn't come to that though.

Stark ended up cleaning him off with a warm washcloth that felt heavenly against his oversensitive skin and neglected cock.

In the kitchen they had spent hours just touching and true to his word Stark had never touched Loki where he wanted to be touched the most.

Stark had said something along the lines of, "I rather like when you look all debauched like this," before giving Loki a kiss that lingered. His eyes couldn't stay open and he vaguely heard the God of Fortification leaving as he fell asleep.

"Jarvis, how long have I been asleep?"

"Just over 18 hours. Ms. Cook has started preparing a meal for you. I recommend having breakfast in bed. Also, Sir placed a book and a glass of water on your nightstand an hour prior."

"Where is Stark?"

"Sir and Ms. Potts are currently at a board meeting. He won't be back till late in the evening. You've been given access to most floors of the building. Sir has also set up two accounts for you in each gender in case you would like to go out or if you happen to run into Agent Romanoff again." Loki considered that news briefly.

"Can you have Ms. Cook bring in my decanter of vapor as well?"

"Of course." Once again Loki wondered how exactly Stark had created such a useful entity.

Loki propped himself up, feeling his muscles strain, still feeling fatigued from his earlier escapade. He now had a better idea of why the Aesir thought so lowly of the Jotuns. The Aesir were prudish by tradition. Sex was only between a married man and woman and solely for the sake of creating children. If the sort of mind numbing, body shattering touching that happened between him and Stark earlier was a benchmark than he was sure Jotuns did not have the same social stigma towards sex.

Loki felt a bit stunned when he realized he hadn't even had sex. They had just been touching, rubbing, biting, and licking. Stark only touched his cock when at the end and that was in a nonsexual manner.

Ms. Cook delivered twice her usual amount of food to Loki and he was more than grateful for that. He hadn't felt this physically spent in centuries, but at least this time it was a good aching as opposed to when he had been trapped deep underground with Thor's merry band of morons and no food.

Loki devoured his food and contemplated spending the day in his bed. It was very tempting, but he smelled like sweat and sex, scents that were too distracting. When he was finished showering the empty tray of food was gone, leaving only the bottle of vapor behind. His bed was also stripped down and he figured Ms. Cook was washing the bedding.

He sat on the window seat and began practicing imbuing the vapor with his magic.

* * *

By the time Stark got back that night Loki was able to make the vapor form into two battling figures. Loki didn't know exactly how to greet him, nor did he know if their status was that of student and teacher or as lovers. He settled on nodding with a smile.

"Would you like to get up to some mischief with me?" Stark asked while grinning widely.

"Yes, what sort of mischief do you want to get into?" Loki looked Stark up and down trying to get any clue of what he had in mind. He was in a well tailored suit, giving nothing away.

"The Avengers, excluding Big Brother Thor, are getting together for dinner. It might be entertaining to have you there in your female disguise, make a few biased comments, weird them out and the like. Should be fun."

"Yes, that should be enjoyable. Shall I use a glamour or do you have any female clothing I can use when I shape shift?"

"Jarvis ordered you some outfits for your different identities." Stark glanced around.

"They're being delivered via the service elevator now, Sir." Jarvis announced. Stark tilted his head to the side and murmured a spell under his breath.

"It should be in your room now." Tony said while pulling off his tie and heading to his own room.

Loki paused before nodding to himself and going to his own room. There was a large stack of boxes waiting for him. With the wave of his hand they were all laid open and in a row. He perused the different contents. Loki settled on a blue dress that was far too short by Asgard's standards, but this was Midgard. Besides that he wanted to look good, even if it wasn't his true form.

He discarded his usual sparse clothing while shape shifting, losing inches and softening his edges. He examined himself in the mirror. This female form was desirable, functional even, but it still made him frown. At some point he started preferring Jotun-blue to his old cream palette.

Loki pulled on his dress and heels, musing up his hair a bit and reddening his lip.

Very attractive, very _not_ Jotun.

Loki rolled his green eyes before meeting Stark in the living room.

When they arrived the team was already halfway through their main course.

"Avengers this is my lover, Lover these are my Avengers." Stark gestured vaguely while glancing at the menu.

"Hello, I'm Lola Bjornson." Loki introduced himself, eyeing each one sharply. "It's nice to see you again Ms. Romanoff." Loki leaned forward, leering at the red headed woman. "You were rather good at avoiding the cameras when those scary aliens attacked."

"I like keeping my anonymity." Natasha glared at Stark assuming he was the one who told 'Lola' her name.

"Some of us work better from the shadows." Clint spoke loudly, drawing Loki's attention away from Natasha. "Tony over there is all about being flashy, but the problem with the flashy heroes is that they spend so much time showing off that they get hardly any work done. The real heroes are the ones who work behind the scene, shooting down the bad guys before you even know there's a problem." Clint winked at Loki. "So what is a lovely thing like you doing with an old has been like him?" Clint nodded his head towards Stark, who only snorted without looking up from the menu.

"You are much closer to my age." Loki said while leaning forward to show him a glimpse of cleavage. "But you seem to forget the benefits of age. Tell me- Wait, what's your name?"

"Geez Clint. You have no manners." Stark goaded while placing a hand on Loki's thigh.

"Sorry, Lola. I'm Clint and I may not be as experienced as Tony, but I'm twice as talented and very spry." He tried to be charming and Loki had to holdback quite a few jokes.

"Then tell me my spry spy-" Clint and Natasha both narrowed their eyes at 'Lola'. "Oh hush, you both are clearly spies. One hides from the cameras and the other admits he works from the shadows." Loki flicked a lock of his light brown hair over his shoulder. "So tell me my spry spy, what's your record? And I don't mean how many women have you bedded."

"My record? As in how many rounds I've gone in one night?"

"No, how many times have you made a woman, or man if it's your preference, come in one night?"

"I really don't think now is the time to be talking about these sorts of things." Steve was trying to control his expression, but his embarrassment was clear.

"Is this the usual sorts of conversations you have over dinner, Tony?" Bruce asked while taking a bite of garlic bread.

"I usually don't eat. Anyway, Lola raises a good question. Clint if you're going to try and poach my woman you better be more than just talk." The archer took up the challenge, finishing his beer swiftly and set it down loudly.

"I'm sure I can do better than that. Fine. My record is six. I made a fine blond lady come six times during one marathon." Clint sat a bit straighter, proud of himself. Loki turned towards Stark, an innocent expression in place.

"Tony?" He made his voice honey sweet.

"Yes, dear?" In contrast Stark's voice was mocking.

"On the kitchen counter last evening how many times did you make me come?"

"I lost count after ten."

"At _least _ten. That's much better than six, my not so spry spy." Loki fluttered his eye lashes.

"I thought you were in a relationship with Ms. Potts." Steve cut in.

"Pep and I were, but then I met Lola." Tony shrugged before telling the waiter his order.

"You just end your relationship with her for another woman at the drop of a hat?" The captain sounded more confused than accusatory.

The assassin and archer exchanged a look while Bruce stayed focused on his meal.

"She's the one who encouraged it, dirty bird that she is." Tony chuckled.

"I find that hard to believe. Ms. Potts is a no nonsense woman." Steve said while cutting up his steak into perfect little triangles.

"She has to be a wild one to go out with me. Is it so hard to believe that she'd invite Lola into our home?"

"Pepper is all sorts of crazy." Loki added in. "Red heads usually are." Loki winked at Natasha. "Speaking of crazy. What happened to the would be dictator? He was rather good looking. I wouldn't mind kneeling for him." Clint's whole face shut down. "What? Did I say something wrong?"

"Dear, we just fought him. Of course we are going to be a bit put out at the thought of him being anything less than a villain." Stark gave Loki a quick peck on the cheek.

"Well it's not like being sexy and being a villain are mutually exclusive. Some of the sexiest people have the worst personalities, like Tony." 'Lola' made a flippant gesture towards him.

"Oh, baby, you always say the naughtiest things to me." Stark said drolly.

"I only speak the truth." An odd sentiment coming from the God of Lies.

"She has your number, Tony." Bruce grinned, having spent many hours with the eccentric billionaire since the invasion.

"Brucie, is that your way of telling me you think I'm sexy?"

"Heaven's no! That's my way of telling you Lola is smarter than the usual floozy you tend to make the headlines with."

"Oh, because you've met so many of those actresses and debutants?" Tony asked, humor evident in his voice. "I'll have you know that some of them can be rather stimulating even outside of the bedroom."

"Can we please talk about something else?" Steve groaned.

"Certainly." Loki sat up straighter as he spoke, a look of complete seriousness on his false face. "How is your sex life, Captain?"


End file.
